Saturday, May 8

Fender Bender Aftermath

I recounted in my last blog post, Spanked for Real for a Fender Bender, how I got into a little car accident due to my inattention and how I was punished for it. There were some interesting comment reactions and responses that I would like to elaborate on, and some aftermath type stuff as well, including an embarrassing exchange at family dinner.

Believe it or not, in more than two decades of driving this was the first car accident I had ever been in. Mind you, I don't drive that often. I don't particularly enjoy it, and most of the men around me have always seemed eager to drive me around.

So the accident was really frazzling for me. I could feel the adrenaline pumping into me. It was long lasting and persisted several days. As it's happening, and immediately after, it feels like your heart is beating up in your throat, and it's hard to speak clearly and put coherent sentences together. Plus your emotions are amplified, and you feel on the verge of crying all the time.

I was feeling all of that when the accident happened. My immediate thought was how stupid I had been, and how my day had just been ruined, and what a bother all of this was going to be (I knew I was completely uninjured as was the other guy, it was not that kind of accident). I was also worried the other person would be angry. When he was in fact kind, gentle, and forgiving with me (I wonder if he was a Christian?), I felt relief and then guilt over ruining his day the way I had my own.

I knew he had had to slow down more quickly than usual, but I figured there was a good reason for that, like the car ahead of him had done something dumb. I was way too close to him and moments before had been a distracted driver which is what led to our collision. I knew it was 100% my fault. Had a policeman observed me, I probably would have been charged.

I imagine there are some people who would have tried to blame the guy ahead for stopping too suddenly and deflect blame from themselves. In our litigious society you are almost encouraged to do stuff like that. But more than that, as human beings we work desperately to protect our egos and will re-write actual events in our minds to come out on top. That is really not an option for me. My domestic discipline arrangement sees to that.

I have this relationship with my husband where I have asked him to hold me accountable. At one point we formalized it in a Domestic Discipline Contract. We cancelled the contract, but the thoughts behind it are still in effect. I know this can be confusing seeing as how we switch. Let me try to explain.

When David is on the bottom he likes to play at spankings and is not interested in a more real-life arrangement. I know it does not seem so at times, and sometimes we will play around real incidents, but they are more like role play scenes drawn from life when I spank him. And in my blogging I sometimes don't make the distinction at all, and even play it down to appear more bad ass which is sexy. And I am pretty bad ass as a Domme if I do say so myself. I can be delightfully cruel, arbitrary, capricious. Like allowing another woman to give my husband a blow job and then beating the shit out of him to remind him to whom he belongs. But through it all, it's play. Sometimes realistic play for genuine offenses, sometimes intense play, or emotionally charged play, but always play. That's what he craves. He does not crave to be accountable to me in the same way I do to him (as the man in our marriage, he's accountable in different ways).

In my case, I crave a more real-life arrangement. I am frustrated that there are not more real-life incidents that justify him spanking me. The DD Contract was a misguided attempt to manufacture that, but it did not really work, and we moved on from it quickly as neither of us found it satisfying. However, out of that attempt, about a year ago, we have settled down into our current arrangement.

David has my over-arching consent to punish me, generally with spankings, whenever he thinks I need it, regardless of what I have to say about it at the time. There are elements of the contract that have informally survived, such as him requiring me to confirm why I am being punished just before the punishment, and my complete sexual availability to him after a punishment. It so far has not happened that I have ever disagreed with a decision of his to punish me, but there have not been many. I think I can count them on one hand. Not that my disagreement would be in any sense meaningful given our arrangement. I just point it out as an observation.

As a result, I walk around, 24x7, with what I call a "spanked wife" mindset. I know that if I genuinely misbehave, am careless, am rude, am disrespectful even, I am subject to a spanking from my husband. You know that changes everything, don't you? Because it does. There is not even one aspect of my life that is not in at least some small way impacted by that situation. I walk around with the certain knowledge that if I fall short, I will be spanked.

Most adults don't have this mindset. Some children do. Perhaps not spanked per se, but having this idea that they will be "punished" by a greater authority in some way if they misbehave. I... crave... that.

I had that as a young child, this immaterial fear of punishment if I was naughty, which sometimes (rarely) was a spanking. As a younger tween and teen this turned more into the knowledge that I would disappoint my parents if I was naughty. This was trained into me, mainly by my Dad, by the dreaded "lecture". It was delivered in private, calmly, rationally. I was, sometimes quite publicly, removed from the company of others, and we had a "conversation". He explained why what I had done was wrong in excruciating detail. The worst part was the palpable feeling that I had disappointed my Dad. In retrospect, I wish he had just spanked me so we could move on and I didn't have to feel that crushing disappointment. I honestly think spanking would have been better for my upbringing during my teens and staved off what was to come. Your mileage may vary.

As I became older, and became more rebellious, I didn't give a fuck if I disappointed my parents. Fuck them! It culminated in me dropping out of school and engaging in all manner of self-destructive behaviours. During that time I thought I was free, but I was actually miserable in the loneliest possible sense, and it culminated in a catastrophe not entirely of my own making which was my "rock bottom". While my relationship with David began my healing process, it was years and years before I felt largely free of the negative impacts of my youth, and my recovery was actually tied up into my sense of empowerment from domming David, and my willingness to more and more over time accept a submissive role in BDSM play.

I noticed, as have all of you, that I was becoming more and more obsessed over BDSM bottom play (I apologize to those of you who followed me for my femdom content). Maybe even obsessed in a not so healthy way? I remember a blog post I made in 2017, Am I Sick in the Head? illustrated with this lead image.

I lead the post with, "My own submissive fantasies sometimes scare me. Am I ill?" I went on to describe an incident where I was corresponding with a man and wrote him a fantasy. As I summed it up at the time,

I was not intending to write all that. It was just going to be a sweet little spanking for me. But then I just started writing, and this degrading misogynistic filth poured out of my brain. I definitely don't want all that to happen for real, but then why do I obviously fantasize about it? Reading it back makes me wet. I do not approve of those things happening to any woman!!!

I ended that post with this thought:

Do I subconsciously resent my husband for being such a pussy sub in the bedroom? Is this what I want for myself?

I don't know if you guys thought I was being coy back then, but my fears about my own mental health around these tendencies were real. I also thought I was being unfair to David as well. He was willing and able to dominate me, but I had been unwilling to truly submit. I wound up working through my issues by writing him a letter and asking him to dominate me in every way imaginable for a full week. It absolutely got over any sense of resentment, and after the experience I felt more connected to this side of me and no longer feared it as much.

But I was still searching for the right balance and for what I really craved. I started fantasizing about spankings from my real Dad - what would that have been like had he continued spanking me? I also started taking on the submissive role more with David, and playing at being a naughty spanked wife. Roleplay started merging into real life with me. For example, we were being playful in bed, he was being a bit dommy with me. He insisted in cumming into my mouth during 69 and me swallowing it instead of me running and spitting it out. I "refused to" (though I had done it before). He (entirely against my will! wink) spanked me until I swallowed. I liked that feeling of being "made to". (Wife Spanked Until She Swallows).

I also recall an incident when we were hiking and I insisted on a wrong turn. He, in turn, insisted on baring my bum in the great outdoors and switching my ass (Naughty Wife Gets an Outdoor Switching). At the time I thought he was using my intransigence as some daring outdoor roleplay material. Of course, it was indistinguishable in every respect from being a spanked wife.

I had also been dabbling with thoughts and fantasies of being a spanked wife. I had found "Christian Domestic Discipline" and was absolutely fascinated by the lifestyle. But for me it was more a fantasy idea to run around in my head, and maybe to roleplay, not a real thing applied to me.

As I said, we were merging and blending roleplay with real life, and just over a year ago, when everybody was super-concerned abut the COVID-19 outbreak, I broke some rules that David considered unsafe towards my parents. It was recounted in Julie Spanked for being Irresponsible. In my words at the time,

What was I thinking? Let me explain. This was not a "play" spanking. It was not incredibly hard or brutal or anything. We have definitely played harder than this. But this was not play. He had put me here against my will. I could have had him thrown in jail (or, yes, used our safeword). But... I knew from the moment he caught me that I had been a bad girl. An actual bad girl. I did something impulsive with the ice cream trip. I lied by omission when I said I was going for a walk. I did not wear a face covering as I implied to him I would. I taunted him by eating the ice cream out in the open. I basically lied to him, technicalities notwithstanding, when he asked me about the ice cream. I ignored his concerns about social distancing. And I mocked him. Yes. I had been a bad girl and I knew I had it coming.

David had actually gotten... the balls... to spank me for real and over my rather firmly stated initial objections. All the realistic play we had engaged in prior, and this edging towards consensual non-consent, had culminated in this. It helped that we had a framework for all this, including a lot of trust, experience, and guardrails (such as safewords). But regardless, he had definitely spanked me against my will. We did not have an "arrangement" like that at the time as we do now, not really.

Brett commented about this episode,

One thing you find with real punishments like this is that you get spanked to tears — not just moist eyes, but the glistening wet cheeks of shame and remorse. You have joined the ranks of bad girls and boys who have had to endure lessons like this historically, and you discovered the emotion of this spanking was unlike your normal experiences.

After all you went through, later masturbating on your tummy is surely understandable, and was probably inevitable. When you fully examine what happened to you, the arousal is going to be intense and, for you, all those particular circumstances led to you imagining yourself being leathered on your exposed behind by your real father.  

It was true, that spanking from David excited me like no other, and triggered many thoughts of parental discipline. It also satisfied me in a deep way like no other. I think I decided then and there that I wanted to become a spanked wife, and I wanted a husband who had the balls to spank me when he thought I needed it. I was also proud of it, not ashamed, and I wanted the world to know. My better sense got to me, and "the world" consisted of my closest family, but that is bad enough and can be very embarrassing! It is possible to be proud of something and embarrassed by it as well. Given the right dynamic and situation, I would happily confess to being a spanked wife to anybody who was interested, no exclusions.

So forget about "having an ego" like I mentioned above. My ego is kept very much in check by the knowledge that I can be upended and spanked at my husband's discretion, even with witnesses present if it was prudent (it rarely would be!).


At some point as the immediate aftermath of the accident unfolded, it did pop into my mind that I would be spanked for this. It was when I blurted out to the gentleman that my husband would be angry with me. That was the moment I realized I would be given a spanking. The two things were simultaneous. I cannot think which preceded the other, the thought or the speech.

It felt like I was admitting to the gentleman that I would be spanked. Admitting that your husband would be mad at you is already a pretty submissive thing I guess, but more acceptable in society. It does conjure up images of a wife-spanking, though. A "liberated" woman would never say a thing like that, about her husband being mad at her. That's spanked wife territory. I think he knew. Maybe he even fantasized about me across my husband's knee getting a sound spanking, or bent over with an already spanked red bum for a further strapping?

There is something primordially exciting and sexy about a spanked wife being dealt with by her husband for legitimate misbehavior, no?


Part of our domestic discipline arrangement that we kept from the contract days is the explicit agreement of my full sexual availability to him after my punishment. I am not allowed to sulk and be resentful. I must remain his wife in every way possible after a spanking.

This sexual availability is actually pretty key in my opinion. Did you know that women bond much more with men during sex than men do with women? Something about the oxytocin levels. We get addicted to our men in a very real sense. Some of this seems to come out during the punishment itself. I sexualize it so much that I think my hormones go nuts during a spanking. I become more able to orgasm, and I become more bonded to the person spanking me. But I think it's at it's peak during penetrative sex. When his penis is inside of me, and I am highly aroused, which happens when I am at my most submissive as well, is when I feel the oxytocin at its highest and I most bond to my man. Yes, sigh, I am addicted to cock, and spanking.


Some on my blog have commented that they found my punishment insufficient. While it is true that the outcome was not so bad, they pointed out that distracted driving is similar to drunk driving, and it could have ended much worse, with lives, my own included, potentially lost or ruined.

I can sympathize with this point of view. I have been a distracted driver, freely messing with my device when my eyes should have been on the road. This time it cost me. I feel I have truly learned a lesson from the experience, and will put the phone away, or pull over as required. It was not my spanking that taught me my lesson, it was the experience of the accident itself. The spanking was more a guilt expiation. And in terms of that, I agree I did get off lightly. I do think I deserved more for the reasons stated.

Many suggested that some form of blistering with a wooden implement would have been appropriate. I have experienced the fiery hell of a blister spanking, though not as severe as I feel I deserved this time, and it is not something I would have any desire to undergo, not even in my fantasies. And yes, a solid five or ten minutes undergoing such a punishment across my husband's knee would have been horrible, but deserved. But that is my husband's decision, not mine, and I trust his wisdom when it comes to my punishment. I did get a half hour of very, very uncomfortable, very humiliating, and utterly interminable nose-in-corner timeout, which many seem to ignore. As a punishment, that should not be under-appreciated. I was not just cooling my heels recovering from my spanking. I was actively pressing my nose into the corner and arching my back in a stress position after a pretty nasty belt whipping.

If you think it's easy standing like that for half an hour you're welcome to try and tell me how it goes.


Earlier today we went over to Mom and Dad's with Sue for "Sunday dinner" (I know it's Saturday! We ask each other, "what day can you do Sunday dinner?"). I discussed with David in advance if they would be told. I wanted it so David agreed. David said I should raise it and explain what happened and how I was at fault. I asked David if he would then prompt me to say how I was punished, and he agreed.

This is not David's idea, this is mine. From the start I associated spanked wife and spanked daughter very closely. The discipline I crave from David is a kind of transference of the discipline I craved and missed out on from my parents at a key juncture in my life. I don't really know if it would have changed anything. I might have been even more rebellious than I was, but we'll never know. I know it's not a societally popular idea, but had I been spanked throughout my teens, I think I would have been kept more in check. I hear that from some Christian households and Southern households, and see how their daughters wind up, and am impressed.

In searching for images to illustrate this thought, I came across a NuWest model named Debbie being punished by her mother that exemplifies these thoughts perfectly. I had previously thought my parental spanking desires were tied up with my Dad, but getting spanked by Mom would be powerful as well.

Imagine if spankings from both my parents continued into my tweens and teens. Just imagine if I had been snippy or rude to Mom, as I often was in my teens. Once she'd had enough, she would paddle me. Imagine me having to put a chair in the middle of the room and drop my slacks and panties as Mommy fetched her big paddle. Oh my gosh! At this point I would not be rebellious. I knew it could get much more painful and embarrassing if Mommy decided Daddy should deal with me.

I would have to bend over and prepare myself. I would already be terrified and regretting my choices.


Mommy would be very strict with me. From the very first stroke I would know I would be in for it.

Before long I would be wailing from every stroke.

Mommy would reduce me to a very sorry red-faced and red-bottomed little girl.

Should this have been me growing up? Would I ever have had a rebellious stage if I was kept in check like this? Or would I have been the sweetest, politest, most studious, most modest girl ever? My modern. educated mind says no. But I feel deep in my heart that I could have benefited from discipline like this all through high school, especially into my senior year when I started going a bit wild, cutting classes, drinking, drugs, and disrespecting my parents who did not at all know what to do with me. Had I been made used to this sort of discipline from my childhood, and had it continued uninterrupted into senior year, I honestly think it would have done me good. Sorry for offending any of you "anti-spanking" activists out there, or those who think it should only happen between consenting adults, but you have no concept of how self-destructive I became as a result of my parents' inability to control me.

So it's a sort of completion for me, and maybe even an "I told you so", for my Mom and Dad to understand I have chosen to be a spanked wife, and what the implications of that are. Yes it's terribly embarrassing, but that's also the point of it. And I must confess, the thrill of it. I've stopped trying to pull apart what role my sexually submissive drive contributes to my desires versus my intense emotional needs, because they are part and parcel and inseparable.

My Mom and Dad have seen me spanked mildly as an adult, by David, as a form of "demonstration"; and I did cajole my Dad into spanking me on my bare bum, twice in fact. So I don't think a real spanking from my Mom or Dad is totally out of the question. I do crave it and feel that being spanked by my husband is a substitute for parental spanking. I have asked David to "fill in" in this regard. Of course, many would say that after your Dad gives you away in marriage, it's up to your husband from then on. I would not disagree that I am David's responsibility now, but does that mean a father is not allowed to spank his daughter any longer? I don't think so. I wish he would see that it's what I've been asking for.

I thought maybe Dad would have been as angry with me as some of my commenters have been, and David could have offered to let him get some licks in? Probably a paddle to the seat of my panties would have been appropriate. I dunno.

But that did not happen. I did tell them mid-dinner about my week, and focused in on the accident. I admitted it all. Daddy just reminded me to keep my attention on the road. David did not need to raise my punishment because Sue jumped in and asked, "did you get a spanking?" I definitely felt a blush rise and said, "sure did. And the belt too."

At that point Dad said, "Oh, you got the belt did you?" with a smile.

"Only a few strokes," David clarified, "to let her know what happens if she does it again." David continued, "What else did you get, after the belt, sweetheart?"

"I had to stand with my nose in the corner for 30 minutes, Sir." Ok. Now I felt foolish.

"Are you going to drive distracted like that again?" David asked.

"no sir," I answered in a small voice, the emotions gaining on me.

I picked up the napkin from my lap and dabbed at my eyes.

"She's learned her lesson," Daddy said. Yeah!

David said, "She has. And before this I haven't had to spank her for a while now."

Oh blush.

"I'm pretty well behaved most of the time," I said with a smile, trying to lighten the atmosphere.

Sue added, "Maybe not spanked for cause, but I'll bet David keeps that butt pretty rosy before sexytime?"

"No comment!" I complained. Ha ha.

"Susan, stop." Said my Mom, but also with a smile. They all laughed a bit as I blushed at the obvious truth of it. Mercifully, the conversation moved on, the topic of my spanked rear having run its natural course. I liked it, the fact that my spankings had reached the status of dinner time conversation.

 

So honestly, given what you know about me, tell me what your guys thoughts are about the idea of teenage girls still being spanked by their Moms or Dads? Bad idea, or do girls like me a world of good?

103 comments:

  1. I think I'm almost the complete opposite to you, in this regard. I got my last spanking from my mother when I was erring towards the end of being 16. So you may as well say my entire childhood. It was a strict Catholic home and my mother handled all the discipline for myself and my brothers. She kind of had to, my dad was pretty absent, but that's another story. And, I'll be honest, having lived through that... I kind of wish another method was used. Not because it's abusive or anything like that, and I don't think that spanking is a bad behavioural adjustment tool, but for me personally with a kinky nature oriented around spanking... I look back and feel a bit ashamed. I feel like my upbringing caused my kink and that kinda weirds me out, lol. Don't get me wrong, I'm not traumatised by it or anything like that, but it is a little bit of a "gross" thought, you know?

    Like, the way I was spanked right the way through until I was almost 17 is my ideal fantasy when imagining playing. The implement, the ritual, everything and if my partner doesn't quite know the process I always feel a little pang of disappointment. It's something that I've just come to accept and to open myself up to new experiences instead of hyper fixating... but that pang of disappointment is always there when it doesn't play out juuuuust right.

    So I guess we're almost two sides of the same coin, haha. But yeah, hope this insight from someone who experienced it first hand will give some perspective. Feel free to ask questions if you'd like, but I reserve the right to veto them if need be!

    -Kasey

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    1. I doubt the spankings caused your kinkiness about spankings as there are so many never spanked who get it, and many spanked who do not. But given your kink, it's natural that you fixate on the methods used. It's normal for fetishists to get fixated. I'm just imagining how fun it would be if I had a partner who told me how important every detail is and we discussed it in minute detail before trying, and then working to make it absolutely perfect!

      My question is, were you already kinky when you received your last spanking, and did you sexualize it in your mind and/or masturbate to it after?

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    2. Eh, it is what it is. I've acted out the scene before in pretty much word for word, action for action detail and lemme tell you... I regressed almost completely lol. Feeling like you're all of twelve again, being thoroughly punished for a wrongdoing and having your body betray you is a feeling like none other!

      As for your question, ugh, that's a really, really good question and my answer is going to be somewhat complicated. You've got to remember that I was raised in a very religious household and anything to do with my body, and pleasure were very much frowned upon... that said... whenever my brothers were being punished, I would always listen in and try to catch a glimpse if I could. I remember I would literally be shaking, not in fear, but anticipation? Every word I heard, every spank delivered was like a gunshot to me and it took an extraordinary amount of effort for me to remove myself so as to not be obvious in my spying.

      As for my very last spanking itself, was I aware? No. Did I sexualise it? Not during, nor in the immediate aftermath. That's the thing about getting a spanking, it has a knack of making you feel like a little kid again both during and afterwards and I definitely sulked and stayed in my room as long as I could afterwards. I definitely felt very small, little and well chastised, not the "adult" all of 17 years.

      That... that all said... and this is where I admit something which makes me blush... hours later, when I was in bed, usually I would rub my backside until I fell asleep, which after a spanking was almost immediate. Enduring one is exhausting! But for whatever reason, that evening, I guess I was rubbing harder and more vigorously than usual? And inadvertently my hand brushed my pussy and it felt really, really good. I kept going for a little bit, but felt a TONNE of guilt and, I shit you not, almost went and asked my mother for another spanking buuuuut given the "offence" I had done I was far too embarrassed to go through with it. I felt so bad and like a degenerate for doing it. So I stopped. No orgasm, just a lot of shame and guilt.

      So yeah, I guess I had sexualised it. I just had no way to really know what to do with that information at the time. Oh to be young and naïve again, eh?

      -Kasey

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    3. Hmm, thinking on it more, I'm not sure that was my last ever spanking but it's the last one that left an impression that I still remember 15 years later. It was definitely one of my last ones though.

      -Kasey

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    4. And just imagine if you had continued rubbing and involuntarily moaned, and Mom happened to be just outside your room at that instant, burst in on you, and catches you red handed as the orgasmic waves roll over you. She'd give you such a spanking!

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    5. Oh my god, if she'd caught me doing that... Christ I hate to imagine. See, in my house, embarrassment was seldom ever used to make a punishment worse. When we were all a lot younger we got spanked in front of each other, but as we got older it mostly exclusively moved to be more private.

      However, if the offence was bad enough, like I'm talking dire dire dire shit. I can think of only four occasions between my brothers and I, throughout our entire childhoods where this happened. Once when my brother was caught drink driving, once when my other brother was almost arrested for trying to shoplift DVDs, once when I was outed for smoking and once when both of my brothers were caught drinking under age. But if the offence was bad enough, my mother would use embarrassment to make the punishment so much worse. We're talking not in the bedroom with the door closed any more, we're talking in the middle of the living room where everyone could see.

      So yeah, if I had been caught doing that... my next half our would be spent half naked being spanked purple in front of anyone who wanted to see in the middle of the house. In fact, looking back, I daresay that masturbation would have been deemed an even worse offence than any of the aforementioned four. Christ knows what Mum would have done, if I'm frank with you.

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    6. I can imagine. In the middle of the house, buck naked for Dad and brothers to see. Bent over the back of the sofa. Your legs would be well spread for show and tell as Mom would explain to the assembled your exact offence as she purpled that backside!

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    7. Honestly? I don't know if she would go as far as stripping me entirely in this scenario, but like... I can't rule it out either? Masturbation would have been one of the most vile things she could have imagined me doing, so her punishment would have reflected that emotion too, I'm sure.

      Those more public spankings were different for me than they were my brothers. And I guess their private ones were too, but they were private so I never saw them, just heard them. When we were young we all went over the knee when punished, it was just what happened. I assumed this continued to be the case behind closed doors for all of us, but when my brothers got caught drinking, they were bent over the lounge. When I was outed for smoking, I was still thrown over Mums knee. I guess my brothers being boys were bigger and stronger than me and she couldn't keep them in that position any more. I was very jealous of my brothers about that.

      But yeah, looking back I dread thinking about what she would have done. I really don't think she would go so far as fully stripping me, or making me spread my legs to expose myself. She definitely would have found a way to make it the worst experience of my (then) life though, I'm just not entirely sure how.

      That said! If I put on my fantasy cap, and think about what I would have liked to have seen myself get for masturbating like that... A checklist:
      1. Naked
      2. No covering up (Mum used to let us put our hands over things)
      3. In a humiliating position for doing such a degrading act to myself, maybe on my back, legs up?
      4. Of course this would have to occur with my brothers and Dad watching, maybe even my cousins too who lived closeby.
      5. A speech telling everyone what I had been caught doing, and making me show everyone what I had been doing.
      6. Not being able to sit for a week!

      -Kasey

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    8. Nice list! Since were ad-libbing...
      7. Brothers to either side of you holding your labia wide open and up, Mom taking a single-tailed strap and giving you one stroke to the very center of the problem...

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    9. Julie, your sadistic streak is shining through, lmao. That is so mean!!!

      -Kasey

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    10. 7 is nice.
      Mom can also try with rubber band, deep inside.

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  2. I don't think children should be hit, which includes all forms of corporal punishment. First, it teaches them a bad thing: that it's okay to use force to get your way. Second, it is inextricably tied up with sexual sensations. I think that's inappropriate for children. And third, by its nature, it is non-consensual.

    This is a general rule, and could have exceptions. For example, I would not put up with a child who was violent toward other people, and if it were necessary to use corporal punishment to get them to stop, then I think that's warranted. Why should they be allowed to get away with something that you aren't willing to do to stop it?

    In my experience as a child, when I was spanked, paddled, or whipped, I don't remember a single case where I thought it was warranted or correct. I thought the adult involved was crazy, and usually arbitrary.

    As for your case, Julie, I don't think it would have been a good idea to continue corporal punishment into your teen years. Every person has their own process, and we should respect that.

    But, we'll never know. You can't go back and do it differently.

    What do we do with children who misbehave? There are plenty of non-violent punishments. You can take away a cherished item (their phone, for example). Ground them in one way or another.

    And, of course, you can do what your father did, which is to explain (in painful detail) why the child shouldn't have done what they did.

    I think the key thing in discipline is logic. That is, the severity of the punishment should fit the severity of the misbehavior. In fact, with one of my girlfriends I worked out with her a chart for the type of infraction and the severity of the consequences, so that we would know what consequence should be applied. For the child, I think the knowledge that the consequences will be rational helps them decide what to do. It also makes the punishment more effective, because they start to think about the effects of their behavior.

    So, that's my answer to whether teenage girls should be spanked by their parents. Fine for a fantasy, even one acted out. But not fine in real life.

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    1. I disagree that spankings teach kids to use force. Society allows force in many instances, police, army, sports, and people don't therefore think in other inappropriate situations that use of force is ok. And as you say, spanking is the perfect remedy for children who inappropriately use force: let the punishment fit the crime.

      I think you can't impose spanking out of the blue, both age wise and societally, and really need to have a whole matrix that makes it acceptable to be effective, and has penalties including family and social approbation when parents go too far because there are many bad and stupid parents who have no business punishing children at all.

      So all in all, I cannot disagree with a ban in order to keep children safe from bad parents, but you are throwing out the baby with the bath water in my opinion.

      Delete
    2. Totally agree. We must rethink at the societal level the conditions for the possibility of a return to corporal punishment, (and particularly spanking for women), in families but also in other social groups.
      We must relaunch the proposals and negotiations with the objective of rebuilding a complete social matrix that will make possible and acceptable the return of bare-ass spanking and perhaps even public spanking.

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    3. I agree! Perhaps I can set my imagination to work on a plausible sequence of events that gets us there. Make an book novel out of it!

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    4. You asked for an opinion, and you got mine. I stand by it. Hitting children sends the message that it's okay to use force to get your way.

      We don't use non-consensual force in other cases, except in the application of law. In that case, we take steps (in civilized society) to ensure we have cause to take away the person's rights.

      As for Anonymous, as long as I get to make the rules and decide who gets spanked, then I'm good with public spankings.

      Delete
    5. And I'll stand by mine. Children observing appropriate use of force are only taught how to use force appropriately.

      Delete
  3. It does sound like it would have done you some good, and I like the way you're both repenting for your own sake and, in your own way, showing your parents that you're now more responsible and willing to take the consequences for your actions.

    I know you'd have loved your Daddy to have got outraged and to have spanked you on the spot (as would we all!) But I think it's very healthy and satisfying that everyone knows your husband is dealing with you sensibly and that you're living your best life!

    Props, as always, to Sue for labelling on some extra humiliation! She really is a master at it, and never let's an opportunity slip! Maybe I should start e-mailing her!

    I don't agree with corporal punishment or spanking minors in general, or anyone unconsenting really. I don't think it's something you can state as a categorical imperative. Then again, I was painfully well behaved, never had a detention, never got into arguments with my parents, I was scared enough of authority really! Not that there weren't kiss who couldn't be controlled. I remember one lesson where a kid just ran outside and climbed up a tree, and we all just watched as the teacher failed to talk him down! Maybe he could have used a spanking, literally nothing the school did worked. Then again, maybe it would have been just as ineffective and the kid would have resented the school system just even more!

    I love how happy and proud you are of your spanked wife status, even when it is making you blush!

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    1. I think it's just common sense that misbehaviour is punished on the spot and then forgiven. But as we know, meting out such discipline needs a mature and sensitive disciplinarian, and we have precious little of that in positions of authority nowadays.

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    2. I think that's the problem with allowing spanking as discipline for minors, or anyone who doesn't consent to it. The harm done by people using it badly would be irredeemable. I think about the teacher who left her class to try and talk a boy down from a tree, she probably wouldn't be comfortable or effective spanking that kid anyway. He'd have laughed it off. Another teacher I had threw a chair at a student out of frustration. Would I like him to have permission to touch kids in any way? Not really! A third teacher I had let a 14 year old push him to the ground, so he was sat on his arse! The kid was probably a foot and as half taller than the teacher and the teacher never punished him for it. We all knew it was because he was embarrassed and lost some respect for him, even though he was a genuinely nice guy.

      I think it's something best left to fiction and roleplay. I'll make an exception for grown women dressed as trampy schoolgirls, they deserve everything they get!

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    3. I think you need the whole cultural matrix, and then it's fine.

      Delete
  4. We would love to see you in that exact, yellow gingham outfit Julie, the next time you need to be “dealt with”. Would you please?

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    1. I'll see if I can order one up!

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    2. I would bloody love it if you incorporated a punishment dress into your routine! Bobbie's Dropseats used to sell them as well as use them in their videos; Julie Simone and Madison Young have to wear very similar yellow dresses in The Stepdaughter Diaries, and Clare Fonda has to wear one in Stepdaughter's Revenge!

      I imagine David surveying the damage to your car and telling you to change into your punishment outfit; he'll be dealing with you once he's taped up the fender.

      You sit nervously in your silly yellow dress and full backed cotton panties, knowing you're about to bare all!

      David takes his seat, lowers your panties and hitches up your dress, pinning it in place.

      He spanks you soundly and places you in the corner.

      Afterwards your panties come up and the dress stays on, though rolled up to expose the bottom of your red cheeks and the back of your thighs! It's another reminder of your status as a naughty spanked wife!

      You can even wear it outside, though with the back unpinned! If you wear it to Sunday lunch then everyone knows you were naughty that morning!

      Plus I'd love you to wear it as you nervously make your way to your appointment with Miss Chris! Maybe with the added humiliation of a diaper underneath on the return trip!

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    3. You are one for the traditional outfits!

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    4. I think being told what to wear is very overlooked, and can be relatively inexpensive. I saw an article recently about a husband who was forced to go outside once a week dressed however his wife dictated after she caught him cheating, she had a Facebook set up and everything! Turns out he's a sissy anyway, but I think you and your readers might enjoy this:

      https://m.facebook.com/ShameMyHubby/photos/?tab=album&album_id=107276574296672&mt_nav=1&ref=page_internal

      There's a DiaperedOnline scene where Mandie Rae is forced to dress like a little girl for a supposed big family event and she appears visibly anxious despite it being fictional and despite being seen naked and in diapers plenty before. She always seems very vulnerable to being teased, it's adorable! So yeah, humiliating outfits are more embarrassing and thus sexier than nudity in my eyes! As you're fond of saying, your mileage may vary!

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    5. Humiliating outfits is a fun kink for sure!

      Delete
  5. Our only daughter wasn't the type to disrespect us or talk badly to us. We were very attentive to her education and, without ever using corporal punishment, we made sure that she always admits her mistakes and apologizes to us or to other people.
    We brought her up with rigor but with a lot of love too.
    It happened that we put her in the corner or that we punished her by depriving her of her skirt for the evening if she had been insolent for example.
    As a teenager, we felt in her the temptation to take the wrong path.
    Friends who had always spanked their two daughters encouraged us to give it a try.
    We started on the skirt first and then quickly, we switched to naked spanking when she deserved it. She cried a lot, especially if she was punished in the presence of our friends, but she almost accepted gratefully. She has now grown into a very well-behaved young woman and we often tell her that she was lucky to have us.
    So to answer your question, it can do a lot of good for different kinds of daughters.

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    Replies
    1. Yes, that makes sense. Removal of clothing in a family situation would be a very potent punishment for certain aged girls.

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  6. I think you need another tea with Mom explaining all this and asking for the cleansing spanking from her. Possibly before everyone arrives for Sunday dinner with a belting and corner time after dinner from your Dad with everyone listening. Then you might feel absolved, in your mind, from your younger errors. You should have to bring your own hairbrush and hand it to your Mom when it is time and after dinner you should have to ask your Dad, in front of everyone, for your deserved strapping. -Good Luck

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    1. Nah - David and I (and Sue) have decided that it can only be talk from now on, unless Dad gets it into his head to initiate, which I doubt.

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    2. I guess you will have to ask Sue for a paddling then David for the strap. After you come clean to them. Probably spread out over an afternoon and evening with you cooking bare bottomed. They eat desert, you wait in the corner for your naked strapping. You can then feel absolved as you graciously suck him off.

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    3. I don't think you get it. David decides.

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  7. Bad idea or world of good ?
    If i used obscene language at home, swear at my parents in a very disrespectable manner, smoke or oppose my "usual" punishment - I could be pretty sure I was gonna get it. My parents were very strict about that type of things.
    Typically Mom or Dad just called me to the living room (there were always both of them there still). When any of them commanded me just to lift up the skirt and drop the knickers to the knees, I felt a kind of relief: "OK, just a barebottom spanking over Mum's or Dad's knee". But if they told me to get bared below the waist I could prepare for the worst. Generally, they gave me a thorough and painful barebottom spanking with a hand or a hairbrush (usually both) and then told me to get up and recover my temper. While Mom got the implement ready and Dad pulled the spanking table to the middle of the living room I tried to manage cries and sobs - but in fact, I never suceed cause I knew pretty well what was in store for me. When everything was ready Mom firmly took my hand and shoulder and led me to the dreaded table. Crying bitterly I carried on the routine: to sit at the edge of the table (with my bottom already sore), to lie back, to adjust the position a little bit and to wait for the further instuctions. My father came around the table to stand by my head. "Lift your legs up! Spread them and keep your hands at your knees". I usually obeyed with my eyes closed - I was really scared and embarrassed! Dad took my feet firmly and held them wide apart. Then a few words about my misdeed was being told and finally, I screw my eyes waiting. Mom took a strap and spanked my vulva with full force about 15 times, while I was screaming at the top of my lungs.
    The last time I had my pussy whipped at 15. I was studying for rather a hard exam (actually I was gonna try to re-pass it after a failure two weeks before), when my dearest parents came to give me a light "maintenance" spanking to improve my diligence. I did not like the idea and started a screaming match. Of cource it was a big mistake for my parents grew angrier and angrier and finally Dad ordered me to get downstairs and undress for a spanking of my life. It was very painful and I tried to complete my studies an hour later kneeling by my desk with my legs spread wide for I was unable neither to seat nor to close my thighs together.
    Julie

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  8. The series of pictures where the mother is spanking the daughter, that proves that Mothers know best when it comes to spankings. To be in her daughter position, I would be pleading, promising to be good, she may be saying the samething, but you cannot fool a Mother, they know how hard, how long to spank and could care less about the pleading, promising to be good, their getting a spanking for not being good. Jack

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    1. I agree. The crocodile tears may work on Daddy, but not on Mom!

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  9. Soz not exatcly on track, but I love the pic with the yellow dress, it feels so real !
    I have started a story for Eilean Beithe… Some might remember its defunct website… Some might even have kept drawings, and/or its logo which I am missing…
    B :)

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    1. I found the Debbie ones super real as well. Strict Christian Texas Mom circa 1960...?

      Looking forward to the story!

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    2. I read somewhere that what’s special about these pictures is the fact that Debbie is actually getting spanked by her own mother Margo. True ?

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    3. That would be SO COOL!

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    4. Yes, it was really Debbie's mother (and Debbie wasn't the only one she spanked). Margo (Debbie's mother) also liked to give enemas after spankings but Debbie had enough of those as a young girl and drew the line at spankings and paddlings.
      They both came on the scene with Nu-West in 1980.
      We don't know what happened to mother Margo but Debbie eventually married a minister and went to live in India where his church had some kind of orphanage.

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    5. That's why they're the hottest pictures, because they are real discipline from a parent.
      Alex

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  10. I would understand your parents not spanking you in your rebellious senior year if they had never spanked you before, and didn't believe in it.
    But they had, so it begs the question why they didn't go back to it if they had tried everything else.
    They should have either kept spanking you till you left home, or never spanked you at all.
    So your Daddy should have whipped your 18-year-old butt with his belt until you couldn't sit down till after prom :D

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    1. I got my last spanking around 10 from my Mom, the infamous "peas incident", and Sue at around the same time at 13. They stopped because of the research around spanking not being good for kids. My Mom was an education policy type person as a career. The most I ever got after that was a talking to. By the time I started really getting out of control I was around 17 or so. I guess they did not consider spanking an out of control 17-year-old which I can't blame them for at that point. Had they more consistently spanked, up to 17, it would have been more appropriate I guess.

      And I agree I needed the whipping... I spent "prom night" high and having sex with a boy in a hotel room claiming I was at an after party... they still don't know that.

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  11. Tout d'abord permettez moi de vous dire, que malheureusement arrive souvent des accrochages ou des accidents, des que l'on conduit...
    Après il faut relativiser une voiture c'est un morceau de tôle et de plastique qui nous permet de se déplacer donc lorsqu'il y a que des dégât matériels ce n'est pas grave...
    Néamnoins c'est vrai que lorsque on fait une grosse bêtise en voiture qui entraîne, des blessures, ou voir plus grave, la ce n'est plus pareil, c'est une vie souvent gâchée pur tous ceux qui en sont les auteurs et victimes...

    Bien sur que des qu'un accrochage est commis par sa propre faute, il faut que cette faute soit punie et donc une fessée et tout a fait appropriée...

    Mes filles reçoivent la fessée des lors qu'elles ont une contravention ….

    En ce qui concerne la fessée parentale je peux bien sur vous en parler, mes 2 filles ont été fessées adolescentes et ont toujours eu après une fessée dure, un meilleur comportement … 
    la fessée n'est pas de la maltraitance, des l'instant quel est comprise, comme étant l'effacement de la faute, et non pas dans le ressentiment, de plusieurs jours de culpabilisation, qui empechent les relations normales...
    les ados préfèrent cette solution au lieu de ressentir par le silence ou les cris de leur parents qui vont faire de la peine pendant des jours, en se sentant rejetés ...

    Mais comme vous vous en doutez la fessée il y a des gens qui n'aiment pas du tout donc cela reste une punition....

    Mais d'autres personnes comme nous, qui aimons la fessée, puisque dans ce sentiment a la fois de honte, de douleur, cela déclenche dans notre cerveau ce trouble qui donne ensuite ce plaisir si particulier de la fessée, pour ceux qui l'aiment, et donc apporte ce plaisir ambiguë de punition et plaisir, qui pour la femme la fait mouiller, et pour l'homme le fait bander, avec comme résultat un plaisir sexuel complet, qui va jusque l'orgasme....

    C'est pourquoi la fessée parentale est souvent un désir pour les enfants adultes, qui ont été fessées adolescentes, avec ce coté ambiguë a la fois de punition et de plaisir... 
    Elles ont été fessées régulièrement étant ados par mon ex femme , moi même, et ma belle mère, leur grand mère, la fessée à toujours été naturelle...

    Avec mon ex femme nous l'avons compris, discutés avec nos 2 filles, et des lors, nous avons assumer les 2 cotés de la fessée....

    Et ce sont elles d’abord ma fille aînée, qui nous ont demandées de les refesser adultes …

    Je vous parle de mes 2 filles n'ayant pas eu de garçons, mais moi même je me rappelle très bien des mes « très bonnes fessées » de ma maîtresse d'école, qui ne m'ont pas traumatisées, bien au contraire puisque c'est comme ça que j'ai commencé a aimer la fessée …

    Après pour ceux et celles qui n'aime pas la fessée je ne peux pas vous dire a leur place ce qu'ils ressentent … 

    Donc voilà il faut reconnaître les 2 cotés de la fessée, punition , plaisir, pour ceux qui aiment, et faire son propre choix, et sa liberté de faire ce que l'on veux....


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    1. Translation:

      First of all allow me to tell you, that unfortunately often collisions or accidents happen, as soon as we drive ... After we have to put a car in perspective, it is a piece of sheet metal and plastic that allows us to move so when there is only material damage it does not matter ... Nevertheless it is true that when we do a big mistake in the car which results in injuries, or even more serious, it is not more the same, it is a life often wasted for all those who are the perpetrators and victims ...

      Of course that as soon as a collision is committed, this fault must be punished and therefore a spanking is totally appropriate ...

      My daughters get spanked whenever they get a ticket….

      Regarding parental spanking I can of course tell you about it. My 2 daughters have been spanked teenagers and have always had after a hard spanking, a better behavior ... the spanking is not abuse, from the moment any is understood, as being the erasure of the fault, and not in the resentment, of several days of guilt, which prevent the normal relations ... the teenagers prefer this solution instead of feeling by the silence or the cries of their parents who will hurt for days, feeling rejected ...

      But as you can imagine, for spanking there are people who do not like it at all so it remains a punishment ....

      But of other people like us, who love spanking, since in this feeling both shame, pain,this triggers in our brain this disorder which then gives this special pleasure of spanking, for those who love it, and therefore brings this ambiguous pleasure of punishment and pleasure, which for the woman makes her wet, and for the man hard, with complete sexual pleasure as a result, which goes to orgasm ....

      This is why parental spanking is often a desire for adult children, who have been spanked as teenagers, with this ambiguous side at the same time of punishment and pleasure ... They were spanked regularly as teenagers by my ex wife, myself, and my stepmother, their grandmother, spanking has always been natural ...

      With my ex wife we ​​understood it , discussed with our 2 daughters, and from then on, we took on the 2 sides of the spanking ...

      And they are first my eldest daughter,who asked us to re-spank them as adults…

      I'm talking about my 2 daughters who didn't have any boys, but I myself remember very well my “very good spankings” from my school teacher, which did not traumatize, on the contrary since that's how I started to like spanking…

      Afterwards for those who do not like spanking I cannot tell you in their place what they feel…

      So there you have to recognize the 2 sides of spanking, punishment, pleasure, for those who love, and make your own choice, and your freedom to do what you want ....

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    2. I envy your attitude towards your grown daughters!

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    3. J'adore mes filles avec le coté parental bien sur, leur bonheur, et je sais que lorsqu'on les fesses, elles ressentent a la fois leurs punitions cotés petites fille a 39ans et 37ans, et savent que ont leur donnera aussi leur plaisir et le notre de la fessée sexuelle, ce qui décuple leur plaisir ….

      C'est pour ça qu'elles aiment par leur coté exhibes, se faire fesser devant du monde, mais aussi se faire fesser en privé, pour que on leur donne leur plaisir que l'on ne peux pas faire en public....

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    4. Translation:
      I love my daughters from the parental side of course, their happiness, and I know that when they are spanked they both feel their punishments on their little girl's side at 39 years old and 37 years old, and know that it will also give them their pleasure and our own from a more sexual spanking, which increases their pleasure tenfold….

      That's why their exhibitionist sides like to be spanked in front of the world, but also to be spanked in private, so that we give them their pleasure that we can not do in public ....

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    5. Le fantasme peu toujours se faire lorsqu'il est accessible ...
      je comprends très bien le votre , puisque mes filles ont le même, et des que je peux, ou nous pouvons, je donne la fessée dans ces conditions...
      Et bien sur, cette honte qu'elle recherchent est encore importante et déclenchent leur orgasmes lorsque la fessée est très exposée, montre bien leurs chattes mouillées, leurs trous du cul, est faite devant de la famille, et aussi lorsque les gens présents sont plus jeunes qu'elles ....



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    6. Bonjour jefesse,

      Utilisez-vous votre pénis pour leur plaisir ?

      Moiaussi

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  12. Thank you for your heart felt post! I am a total spanko, but I do not think children should be spanked under any circumstance. It is by its very nature non-consentual.

    I honestly think that if your parents had spanked you for your wildness as a teen, you would have long lasting repercussions and resentment that would have been difficult to heal.

    Roger

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    1. Maybe. But kids were routinely spanked back in the day and adolescent mental health was likely not as bad as now, though multiple factors at play, but was certainly not a sure thing mental health problem.

      If society approved, if the child is consistently spanked from a young age so no surprises (knows what to expect if she misbehaves), and if the parents are measured and deliver it with love and forgiveness after, I think it would be ok.

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  13. Spanking a teenager is quite legal at least in Australia. Corporal punishment by a parent/carer is not child abuse provided the force is “reasonable”. Force applied to the head or neck or bruising/marking lasting for a “long period” will be not reasonable. So, as you say, it’s quite legal and proper to spank minors at law. Should be more of it.

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  14. Freud says that for his patients who have this fantasy ("a child is beaten"), real scenes of spanking raise a feeling of aversion and are sometimes experienced as unbearable.
    Suppose, in the context of your future novel (?), a country where corporal punishments are socially accepted and organized, where children are brought up with in mind a scale of punishments incurred according to the stupid things they do, where parents are nevertheless subject to some control over the severity of the punishments they inflict.
    What would be your reaction if you could attend a family spanking "open to the public" either as a witness or as a "Checker". Would you fly to the rescue of the punished girl or openly (and secretly) take pleasure at her humiliation?

    PS :I'm pretty sure that a socially consensual real spanking given to a girl (but non-consensual for her) would be unbearable for David who in this area is more of a spanko than you (you are more complicated).

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    1. Had she been truly a naughty girl, I would take pleasure, in multiple ways, from her appropriate punishment, as I am sure would most!

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    2. I like the idea of controlling the severity of punishments. Neighbors could apply to register as controller or checker of their neighbors' household and vice versa. They would witness the punishments of the children and would ensure that there was no abuse. Are you really writing a new book ?

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    3. Good idea!

      Always on the lookout for a topic that inspires me sufficiently to consume 6 months of my life for virtually no reward!

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  15. Our daughter asks for spankings. She is very affectionate and vicious. It seems natural to her. She likes to show off but always as if she doesn't realize. She suddenly spreads her legs and shows her wet panties, or she bends over with a much too short skirt. His skin is very white and quickly bruises. She is lymphatic. She secretes the idea of a drool of continuous hot feelings. She is made for spanking and humiliation. She looks a little sickly and very sexual like she is constantly touching herself while thinking about things a little disgusting. This behavior makes us want to spank her as often as we can and that's what we do and it does her world of good.

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  16. "One thing you find with real punishments like this is that you get spanked to tears — not just moist eyes, but the glistening wet cheeks of shame and remorse."
    So true!
    Where's Brett? It seems to me that he hasn't commented for a long time (it was sometimes a bit long but so fair)

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    1. I think there's a group of them, dan, kdpierre, brett who "ghosted me" for my political opinions. Their loss!

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  17. The mother spanking the daughter pictures, seen them along time ago. When my wife spanks, the Mother in her comes out. She stops when she decides, she insures I have a very red bottom, and now with her 'Jammie' punishment, facing the wall and being seen really adds to the punishment. Jack

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    1. Red like this ?
      https://78.media.tumblr.com/e8b1f98a94697ebdd854fd43081c433f/tumblr_mzml330z2z1suzvb1o1_1280.jpg

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    2. THAT'S A well spanked bottom!

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  18. Mother's Day, I took my wife/mommy out for breakfast, a drive in the country, and then to a very nice restaurant for a special dinner. When we got home I told her how much she has improved my life, and would be not the person I'm today. I then finished this day with slowly undressing her, hugging, kissing, and I enjoy her breast so much. In the morning she said how much she enjoyed the day, but that nothing is going to change, spankings will continue. I said I know that, I just wanted to say Thank You for being my wife and my mommy. She hugged me, and said just be a good little boy, Mommy has a new bath brush, a gift from her mother on mother's day, just what a Mommy needs for her naughty little boy. Jack

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    1. I'm glad you're celebrating.

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    2. Jack,
      isn't it rather your wife's mother who should have had a brush as a gift?

      Delete
  19. Our dad took off when I was five and my sister was three. A few
    years later my mom met 'Gabe' and he eventually moved in and became
    our stepdaddy. Gabe was very enthusiastic about applying corporal
    punishment for all transgressions. For something minor you would
    get a few swift whacks on the seat of your pants with a flat hand.
    For medium level misbehavior it was OTK with the bare bottom being
    smacked with a shoe, wooden spoon or any other handy implement.
    As we progressed into adolescence our 'crimes' became more serious.
    - - Stealing money from Gabe's wallet, drinking his beer, making
    out with boys in the basement - -
    Needless to say, Gabe became quite adept at dragging us to our
    bedrooms, pulling down our pants and underwear, unlooping his belt
    and then thrashing us on our bare buttocks until I guess his are
    got tired

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    1. Well you did sound rather naughty!
      Did the spankings help, do lasting harm, or were neutral?

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    2. --(Must have hit 'Enter' by mistake)--So, to get to the point.
      When we were being punished I never gave much thought as to
      Gabe's state of mind or body. When I was 16 after a really
      thorough spanking, my sister told me that she saw a huge
      bulge straining the front of his pants. I had never made the
      connection between spankings and erotic stimulation, and in
      those days there was no internet to check these things out.
      We lived in a cramped apartment and were always able to hear
      when my mom & Gabe were having a good time in the bedroom.
      It suddenly dawned on us that after we got spanked, it would
      always be followed by my mom & stepdad having sex.
      We continued to be whipped but all it did was make us more
      wild and defiant! When I was 19 he was killed in an accident
      at work. That was probably the happiest day of my life.
      We started concentrating at school, drinking moderately and
      became model citizens. He was a horrible person, and my
      mother was too weak to stop him from beating us.
      Stay Dead Gabe !!!

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    3. Sounds like a nasty piece of work. Good riddance!

      Still would not ban the practice, though. Clearer rules, better education, more outreach, more societal approbation. Spankings should only be given with love in the heart.

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  20. Your question you asked yourself: "What is wrong with me?" was so full of angst. We spend our whole lives trying to figure ourselves out. Why do we like what we like? What even is the definition of "normal?" Who gets to decide what is normal and what is deviant? And why do we sometimes long for this undefined and probably unattainable "normality?"

    Probably every single reader here has asked similar questions of themselves.

    Bottom line: I think all of us have issues of some sort or another. Some we find ways to live with, some we sweep under the rug. Some questions are like the stone of Sisyphus. We'll come close at times to figuring them out but never quite get there. We can only hope for some equilibrium where we grow comfortable with what we explore. As long as things are consensual and (hopefully) safe.

    But then again, the equilibrium soon teeters. Because a) we change b) others change c) society changes d) mores change e) all of the above. And we once again are filled with questions.

    Been there.

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    1. WC here

      When are you going to finally cuckold your sissy hubby? You know he wants a real penis up his bottom!

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    2. Thank you for the sensitive comment, anony. I'm glad you didn't add "sane" to your safe and consensual, always thought that one was misplaced.

      WC: it's up to him.

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    3. Go check out Jillian Keenen on YouTube for well-considered discussion on the origin of spanking kink.

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    4. I've seen her a bit. Got a bit bored as not too kinky!

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  21. I’d agree that had the police observed your accident then you would’ve been charged!
    In fact you should’ve been taken to the station and not only charged but also stripped bare and put naked in a cell. Naturally any lies during interrogation would result in a police belt whipping of your lovely ass.
    Of course there’s a good chance your holes would get a fucking as well. Policing can be dull and a pretty slut like you would be a temptation to the girls and boys in blue.

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    1. I support the police! I only wish there was 0 tolerance amongst their own ranks for bad cops. I will spread my legs for a good cop any day of the week.

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  22. I went to a rather liberal Christian school. (No school sponsored paddling as fun as that would be) But it was in the DEEP south. So there were girls in my graduating class who had been spanked from the time they could walk to the day they got married. They were still in all of my own self destructive years. Some of the most self destructive people I have ever met. I had an incarcerated dad and a mom who was too busy to be that much of a presence. I did however have 4 siblings 3 of whom were overprotective dad like brothers. Who if they ran out of options were willing to flip me over a knee and spank me. It was always over panties as seeing my pussy was highly unprofessional. (Though the little thong underwear I wore in my teen years was not much protection for my little bottom.) Then I started dating in the beginning of my self destructive years. And my boyfriend at the time decided it was time for his girlfriend to get some good old fashioned discipline. So he spanked me for things like drinking. And then I got married to my soon to be ex husband. (Long story) I met him because he spanked me at a college party. (Another long story) And he spanked me too. So in short I would love to say that if I had been spanked more as a kid I would’ve stayed to the straight and narrow when I was young. And been a good praise Jesus modest and sweet little girl. But I realize that’s not true. But I think for some it works. And for others it doesn’t. So it all depends on the girl really.

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    1. You say "my self destructive years" as if it's a natural phase for all girls. It was for me, but gosh I hope not in general!

      'Kinda kinky that your three older brothers spanked you, I must say.

      Probably help not to have a Dad who was in jail. A loving, stable family, with a Dad and mom both present and not emotionally damaged would be a prerequisite, in my opinion, for spankings to really have a good effect on a girl.

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    2. I say my self destructive years. Because that’s what they were. 10 years in and out of rehab and making everyone in my life fear for my life. I wouldn’t say it was kinky that they spanked me. Because it was strictly discipline Nothing more. Nothing was consistent though. The middle one for example hated spanking me. He did it lightly to medium (keep in mind they’re all ripped athletes so light to medium for him still hurt) with just his hand over my covered bottom. Over his knee securely healed so I felt safe and secure. There was never any corner time after. It was straight to hugs and I still love yous. Like he did after my spankings from the other two. And he was always super clingy with me after like he was worried I would hate him. (I never did. In fact he was my favorite and he knew it) The oldest spanked me with a belt over the bed anywhere from really light to full strength usually covered bottom but a few times I was bare. And the youngest of the three of them didn’t do it very often. But when he did it was my wood hair/bath brush over his knee or the bed at medium strength. It definitely did not help to have one completely absent parent and one mostly absent parent. We were a dysfunctional family for a long time. (On some levels we still are even with dad home.) The spankings had a mixed effect on me.

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    3. Your brothers sound sweet.

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  23. The first six paragraphs of psychological reflections are really masterful leading by surprise to this photo of a punished wife, absolutely deprived of everything including the right to wear pants.

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    1. To be more precise, I like that :
      ambition to exist as an individual conscience thinking about the "why" of her acts, did not last long. Social and conjugal obedience is required from the "spanked wife"; that is simply to stand red bottom in the corner, deprived of her clothes privileges, thinking about her bad behavior.
      j.stern

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    2. Yes, I like the absolute morality imposed on me by my husband. Whether I think I am right or wrong is not material. What he thinks about my behaviour is what is important. I choose that.

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  24. A good place to research case studies of women who were spanked in late teens and into their twenties is the forum "Sometimes a Girl Needs a Spanking II". You do have to wade through a lot of dross there, but there are some interesting stories to be found. As others have pointed out, spanking in itself doesn't seem to guarantee a positive outcome for maturing young women. But if it can be tempered with a loving relationship, there's more hope for a healthy result. And of course, some women seem to grow up fine without being spanked at all. So, yet another situation in which we each have to draw our own conclusions. - Frank

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    1. I checked it out, lots of stuff there! Thanks for the pointer.

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  25. Well I think your Dad let you off easy . Therefore I suggest you post a Poll for your followers to vote. Once the car is repaired you be put over the back of a chair and the paddle soundly applied to drive home the lesson. And post a picture of your well busted bottom as proof .... OR ... consider the lesson learned and move on.

    Paddle Daddy

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    1. Tee hee... lesson learned, Daddy!

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    2. hmmmmmmmmm I believe Lil miss julie is afraid that her readers will agree she is due for more discipline when the car is repaired ...

      Paddle Daddy

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    3. David's decision. The joy of being a sub.

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  26. You should’ve been spanked over the bonnet of the car in the driveway as soon as you got home. Neighbors would see and know the reason.

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  27. It almost seems as though you're rebelling against your parents with all this. Rubbing their noses in being too laid-back by being - not exactly uptight, but the opposite of laid-back.

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    1. Well yes. They SHOULD have kept spanking me into my teens and early twenties and I might not have screwed up so much!

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  28. I think proper bare bottom spankings desperately need to make a comeback in society: for all ages, boys and girls. It doesn't teach anything bad it is a consequence that goes along with a lesson (scolding/lecture) to guide behavior.
    I can say that i should have been spanked hard and often growing up. I was a hellion I spent more time with my elementary school principal than i did in class. I often think about how he should have bared my bottom for a good spanking, or my teachers doing the same in full view of the class.
    My parents didn't spank they were a part of the "lets give kids drugs" mentality that swept the nineties and i was on various drugs until my sophomore year in highschool when i stopped taking them so i could enlist. But during one of the many hours long fights i had with my parents my dad got frustrated and dragged me over his knee for several sharp smacks on my short clad bottom. not a proper spanking, not what i needed, but i remember thinking very distinctly "maybe if you did that more we wouldn't be doing this." but I didn't get my first spanking until i was 19 and had to seek it out from a man online. this got me spanked and bummed after, the humbling affect of which has been apart of my disciplinary desires and how i think i should have been punished during high school.
    I wish i could have explained to my parents that i needed to be spanked rather than drugged up and grounded. Spanking is close, intimate (for lack of a better term), there's a finality to the punishment, and a sense of resolution. grounding had none of that for me. I wish i could have told them that it helped me so much.
    Sorry, for the disjointed nature of my response, it's late and i have never written publicly about this before.
    Alex

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    1. See my reply just now to the comment above. All kidding aside, I totally agree.

      You say, "this got me spanked and bummed after". I've never heard the term "bummed" in that context. Is that a slang thing? What do you mean?

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    2. After he spanked me he screwed me in my red, sore, bottom. Bumming is a slang term for anal sex, i;ve only ever heard people from the UK say it. But i use it now because i think it's a fun term for it.
      As to your comment above parents should have the right and duty to blister the bare bottom of their kid n matter the age! I fully believe teens and adults need it more than children sometimes. I know i sure did (do).
      Alex

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