Teaching him to whom he Belongs

One thing Sue said that stayed with me: "he seemed to need more discipline than I could provide to him by myself." No, that's not how this pro domme thing started. It was my idea because I wanted to do certain things in a three-way that I was not comfortable asking Sue to do. It's her fault, not mine. But things like this, once said, take on a life of their own: "Mr. Mayor, can you confirm that you do not beat your wife?"

It also got me thinking. I really want to make darned sure david knows he is not free to visit professionals whenever it pleases him.

So yesterday I sat him down on the couch, and very sweetly told him that, unfortunately, I felt I needed to remind him to whom he belonged today. I told him that he had visited another woman without me present, and I was concerned that there might be confusion about this issue. Poor david swore up and down that he only has eyes for me, and that it was my idea, and he would never have done it without me telling him to do it, and so on. I told him that I am sure his head knows all that, but that I was concerned that his pretty little bottom might be confused. It was funny then listening to david try to defend his rear end! Of course I was messing with him, but isn’t that what it's all about?

I had wanted to do a certain thing to him for a long time now, and I thought this would be a perfect opportunity to unleash. You will see when I get to it!

The first thing I told him was that I felt I needed to get my strap out again and make sure he would have trouble sitting for a couple of days. david looked a little panicked at this. I had not used my strap on him for almost three months now, but he sure remembered that last strapping! I could see his eyes pleading with me, but I was standing firm. He kept repeating that he knows he belongs to me, and I kept repeating that I'm not sure his rear end knows, but it will after it gets strapped good and hard.

I took him up to the bedroom, had him strip naked, and made him lie face down on the bed with his hips over a couple of pillows. Then I got some nylon rope and tied his wrists to the headboard on either side of the bed, tied his ankles together, and tied them to the foot of the bed. Then I took a belt and wrapped it very tightly around his thighs so that his legs would not come apart. I didn't want him spreading his legs inadvertently and me accidentally strapping the backs of his balls. Then I stuffed a pair of panties into his mouth, and used a second pair to tie around the back of his head to keep them in. As I did this I told him "no safe words from me, baby. You’re going to take what I give you. You just keep squirming and begging through that panty gag so that I know you're ok."

In his visit to the pro domme, he had said how helpless and scared he had felt being completely immobile, knowing that she could do anything to him she wanted to. I wanted him to feel that same way with me. With her he had not been gagged, and he had had a safe word. I wanted to go a step further with the panty gagging and no safe word. I wanted him to be more scared of me than he was of her.

I got the strap out, and without any preliminaries whipped it very hard across both his cheeks. I used a full arm tennis swing and was rewarded with a muffled scream, a rectangular strap mark on his ass, and some very unmanly fanny wriggling. His pro domme did not mark him at all, but I sure would. The last time I strapped him (three months ago) I did 75 whacks and went up and down his legs as well. That was overdoing it. This time I confined myself to just 40 and all on his ass. I alternately aimed the tip of the strap to each cheek, though the far cheek still got the worst of it. I had decided after his first strapping that I was going to reserve the strap for special occasions, and never "play" with it, but rather keep his fear of it extremely high. Mission accomplished. By the end his ass was a mess of crimson, black, and blue, and he had tears in his eyes. After his 40 I asked him to whom this ass belongs? I heard a muffled "You! You!" from behind his panty gag.

I was not done with him yet, though, not by a long shot!

I untied him and ungagged him, and then ear-marched him over to the bathtub. I pushed in the plug and told him to get in and lie on his back. He had no clue. It's a little fetish of mine to pee on him. I had not done that yet, and I had decided that today was the day.

I stripped off my sweats and panties, put one foot outside the tub, and the other on the far side up on the lip. Then I squatted down (thank you exercising!) and let loose a stream right on his face. He closed his eyes and screwed up his face, but I told him to face up and open wide. He obeyed and opened up his mouth, and pee started splattering into it. He could not bring himself to swallow any, so he just sputtered it out as soon as it went in. By this point there was a little pool of pee in the tub. I told him to turn over, put his face in it, and stick his ass up. I then directed what I had left onto his beaten-up ass and privates and asked him again to whom that ass belongs? He said it belongs to me, but he had to speak into the pee puddle so it was not very distinct.

That was very, very hot for me. My pussy was tingling like mad. I can now say that there is nothing that makes your boy more your bitch than pee'ing on him like that. You do that, you own that ass!

I got back up and told him to empty the tub. In case you are wondering, it's not as disgusting as it sounds. I have a very healthy diet, and my pee is nice and sweet smelling, thank you very much. I told him to get into the far corner of the tub. I took the spritzer, turned the water on cold, and hosed him down like the monkeys in the zoo (poor monkeys!). That made him jump worse than anything I had done previously! I kept the cold stream on him and made him turn around and around. By the time I was done his penis and balls were tiny and all shrivelled up! Ha Ha!

I told him to get those little peanut balls out of the tub and follow me. I did not let him dry himself at all, so he was shivering all the way back to the bedroom.

"So you like getting your asshole beat by strange women, do you?" I asked him rhetorically. This was one thing he had asked of her that he had not ever asked of me, so I was a bit pissed off with that. I had him kneel on the bed and told him to spread his cheeks open nice and wide with his own hands. Then I got out a little skinny belt (see the picture below) and proceeded to whip it down into his bottom crack.

After some experimentation I decided the best angle was head on so I knelt with my thighs on either side of his head facing down his body, and gave him his bumhole whipping from that position. I experimented with the belt doubled-up and single-tailed, and thought single-tailed worked best with a shortened-up grip. It got so that I could whip down pretty hard, getting some real yelps from him. Once I got into my groove, I gave him a couple of dozen strict ones right down on that naughty bumhole. That'll learn him!

While I was doing that I scolded him for not telling me that he wanted his bumhole whipped and made him apologise repeatedly. "You know you’re getting fucked next, I hope?" I asked him. I had him hold his spread-open position while I got my strap-on around my hips. I lubed it and him, and proceeded to really teach him to whom he belonged!

My "equipment"

Called to the Carpet in front of my Sister

Very exciting! david had his first session with a pro domme Wednesday after work. He thinks she is a keeper, so we will be setting up a threesome next. I can’t wait!

david did his research on the Internet and chose one whose write-up and look we both liked. I gave him permission to go check her out under some pretty strict rules as I mentioned last entry.

While david was out doing that, my sister Sue and I went out for a nice dinner, and I told her what david was up to. She was a bit surprised, but accepted it. I told her we would have a bit of fun with it after david got home. She was up for that. So after dinner we went back to my place and we waited for david to arrive. When he came in, he was a bit surprised to see Sue there (I had not told him my plans for the evening). I got him to come to the living room and tell us what happened. He went to sit down, but I told him to stand in front of us. You have to imagine Sue and I sitting on the sofa with big smiles, and david standing there in front of us, on the carpet, looking quite red-faced.

It was precious! Sue and I quizzed him on the whole experience, and this is what he told us happened as best I can remember.

david telephoned the number and spoke to the lady. She asked him what he was interested in doing and he told her that he was interested in receiving a spanking. Sue let out a little snort/giggle at that and david blushed. They discussed finances and set a date and time. david was to call her the day of to reconfirm, at which point she would tell him her address. david asked if he could send her an email regarding the scene, and she was fine with that.

The email set up the scene as a husband being sent to a professional woman for discipline. david would be bringing along a prop letter that "his wife" wrote to the professional. He said he composed it and forwarded it to her in advance. The scenario was what david and I had agreed to. Sue thought it was most suitable and had a real ring of truth in david's case, since he seemed to need more discipline than I could provide to him by myself (was that a shot at me or a shot at him? Hmmmm).

Sue and I made david read out loud the contents of the email off his mobile. The mocked up letter from the wife thanked the professional for previous sessions and complimented her on what a good job she had done, but said he was now backsliding and needed some firm correction. The letter from the wife suggested "panty training" david, putting him across her knee, spanking him with various implements, and also suggested beating his bumhole with a riding crop! david was so precious as he read those bits out to Sue and I, and we laughed at him so much as he stuttered and stammered it all out! Ha Ha! How embarrassing for him for his own personal kinks to be so exposed to Sue!

Now, I knew he was anal, but I did not previously know that one of his little kinks is getting his bumhole whipped. I'm learning things about him already as a result of this experience! He can expect some good hard cheeks-spread bumhole whippings from me from now on. Be careful what you wish for. I wonder how my strap-on is going to feel going in after one of those whippings? Ha Ha!

He said that he arrived at the address 15 minutes early and just waited, skulking around the block for the appointed time. Then bang on the minute he rang the doorbell. The Mistress opened the door for him, dressed in a robe covering a leather outfit. They made a bit of small talk, and discussed the scenario one more time. She asked if it was ok to mark him, and if he wanted that. david said that a few marks would be ok (wimp!). She gave him a "safeword" to use in case she was going too hard on him (sissy!).

He said she asked him for her fee (which he had all ready in an envelope, but had forgotten to hand her). She conducted him into "the dungeon" which was a kind of mock medieval room filled with all sorts of fun sounding equipment (can’t wait to get my hands on it and have her "show me the ropes" so to speak, with david as my victim!).

She left him there and came back a few minutes later to start the scene. First thing she did when she got back was that she perched on a chair with the letter in hand and commanded david to strip nude! Oh My! david said he was very embarrassed to be standing there buck naked in front of a strange woman like that, and that his penis was erect. Judging by the bulge in his pants as he was telling us this, I don’t doubt it!

He said she then read the letter back to him, adding her own commentary. After finishing it, she made him put on a pair of his panties (that he had brought along with him) and then scolded him for shirking on his "domestic duties". She then took him over to a bench, lay him across her knees, and spanked the seat of his panties with her hand, then pulled them down and spanked some more on his bare bum. david said her hand was hard, and that the spanking actually hurt. Now that got to me, because my hand just does not cut it, but apparently this lady can get a rise out of him with just her hand.

After that she bent him over a table and fastened his wrists and ankles to it, face down and bent over. His legs were a bit spread, but she still was able to lower his panties to just below his cheeks. She then got a thick leather strap and gave him a strapping on his bottom. Here I was more proud, because I asked him whose strap hurt more, mine or hers. This time it was mine by a longshot. Yeah! (Yes - I am ridiculously competitive).

Next she conducted him back to the middle of the large room, made him strip off his panties, bend over at the waist, reach behind, and hold his bum cheeks apart. He said she left him like this for quite a while as she scolded him on doing better at home, and being more obedient to his wife, and so on. She was very good at that, he thought. He said she then used a very long crop to whip the leather spanker end at his spread open bumhole. Poor Sue just shook her head at his revelations. I asked him if it hurt. He said it was very difficult to hold his pose, and it hurt plenty. "Why?" Sue asked rhetorically. Just a shrug from david.

As the grand finale david said he was put onto a cross and fastened legs and arms standing facing it. He said he couldn't move an inch as his limbs were fastened at several places, and there was a thick leather belt around his waist as well. This made him extremely nervous, he said. This woman could do anything to his ass she wanted. The cross was then moved (with him attached to it) via some mechanism to be more like at a 45 degree angle. She then got a cane, and gave him 25 strokes, making him count each one, thank her, promise to be better behaved with his wife, and ask her for the next. He said that was very hard to take, and that he used his "slow down" safeword. Wimp! Wimp! Wimp! Wimp!!! He also lost count a few times (which seems hard to believe) and so she gave him extra strokes for that. He described the cane as being very different than anything else he has been punished with. He said at the moment it struck it hurt, but that a few moments later it hurt even worse. Sounds like I definitely need to get me one of those to use on his butt! No safewords!

After the scene was over she released him and they had a bit of an after-talk. david thought it was all great, and he was impressed that she had executed the scene he imagined so well, and paid such attention to detail. david was impressed that she said she loved doing this, and would do it whether or not she was paid to. He asked if she ever was on the receiving end, and she said that yes she is mostly a sub, both at home and professionally, but enjoys dishing it out just as much. I've never spanked a woman... hmmmm....

david explained that he was there with permission from me, and asked if it would be ok if he brought me along next time, to watch and to participate? According to david, she said she loves working with couples, but it is rare for her to get the chance, and that she would be delighted to. david also got a little tour of the house, and said there were other rooms as well, including a mock schoolroom and a mock medical office.

And that was it, david's first pro domme experience. He seems to have chosen wisely, and I am now eager to meet her.

Of course, Sue and I both wanted to see "the damage", so we made him turn around and drop his pants and undies. He got a few jeers from us as his bottom was hardly marked at all. He swore it hurt plenty when she did it, especially the cane. There was maybe a little cane mark or two, but it was honestly hard to see. His whole bottom was a bit "dusky" I would say, but not fire engine red or anything like that.

I asked him if his bumhole was still sore from its beating? He said it had recovered. I turned to Sue and she turned to me, and we both 'kinda said "I don't know, I think you better show us." david was clearly very humiliated by this turn of events, but bent over and spread his cheeks for our "inspection" like a good little boy. No visible marks there either. We made a point of having him hold that pose while we discussed the state of his bottom hole. Evil. I know. Of course, nothing Sue had not already seen up close and personal!

I released him to stand, and asked him if he was excited being spanked by another woman like that? He said he was. I told him to turn around and show us how excited he was. With a little groan and a sigh he turned around around. I told him to lift his shirt above his tummy so that Sue and I could more clearly see his precise state of excitement.

Sure enough, he had a raging hard-on by this point. I don't know if it was the domme experience earlier that evening, being exposed in front of Sue, or me being strict with him (but more likely the combination of them all), but his hard-on was curling up towards the ceiling and the tip of his penis looked really engorged!

Poor baby! I said. Do those balls needs emptying? I asked.

"yes... please..." he murmured. I knew he would be excited at the prospect of either getting hand-jobbed by me in front of Sue, or being made to jerk off in front of Sue.

I asked Sue if we should make him use his hand to put on a show for us. Sue covered her eyes and said "I think he better take care of that upstairs." Awwwww! Frustrating! She goes this far, why not watch him jerk off? I would in her shoes! Oh well, that's one of the reasons I wanted to do this pro domme thing, to do things that Sue did not want to.

I told him he could go upstairs, but that he was not to touch himself. I'd be up to empty him as soon as Sue leaves.

"Too much information!" Sue said. Ha ha!

After Sue left, I went up to david and made him give me a good hard fucking and cum into me. I didn’t even want any foreplay. I was wet and ready for him. Then I made him get down between my legs and had him finger fuck my G-spot while licking my pussy until I came hard, not once but twice. I love grabbing the back of his head and grinding my cum-filled pussy into his face. Yummy. He's such a girl when I do that.

Can't wait to meet the pro domme lady. Hope she will be as nice with me there. Looking forward to it. Will blog all about it as soon as it comes together.

Professional Attention

Based on reading Ms. Clara's blog (who is a professional dominatrix), I thought it would be fun to take david to visit a local pro domme. So I set david to the task of finding somebody suitable and setting things up. He did a little research on the 'net, and found some likely candidates. So hard to tell from the photos and descriptions, though, and I don't have the time or inclination to screen pro dommes (work keeps me rather busy).

However, I thought david would rather enjoy the "screening" task, so I told him that he could go and have sessions with a few and find one he thinks would be a good fit for us.

Crazy of me, you say? Maybe...

I have some ground rules for him. No sex at all. I don't even want him jerking off and ejaculating. No anal penetration for him. She must stay dressed at all times. He must tell her he is doing this with his wife's consent and permission. Their "fantasy" must be that he is being sent by his wife to a professional to receive some sound discipline. And, he has to tell me ALL about it afterwards. Every little detail.

The thing I realised is that he loves me for me. He also loves his little fetish. That I cater to his fetish is definitely a positive. But if somebody else also caters to his fetish, it is not that he loves me any less. And it is not that he will fall in love with any woman who spanks him - he's in love with the spanking itself. That has become more and more clear to me over time.

So wish us luck on this new adventure... Gulp!

Musings on david's panties

My hubby "hates" his panties. By which I mean he loves to be humiliated in them, of course.

The first time I saw him in panties was when I forced him into a pair of mine before his spanking. Something along those lines was suggested to me on the Topix forum, and it didn't take a long time reading our blogs to figure out that a lot of guys into being dommed by us wives are also into being put into our panties. So I took a flyer on that and made him wear them.

Why did I do it? Mainly I thought it would be fun to tease him as a "little girl getting her spanking" and thought the dressup would go well with that. I lost a lot of respect for him as a man the first time I had him kicking his legs and howling like a baby across my knee getting his bare fanny whacked. I also genuinely do love fucking him in the ass, and I can't help but think of him as taking it "like a woman" when I do that, hence panties again make sense as his go-to dress for that. Obviously, any man who bends over like that and lets a woman do that to him is less of a man in my books. But while I lost respect for him in this area, I genuinely prefer him like this, and would not go back to fake "macho man" for anything.

As usual, after a scene david and I talk. Our thing is not really 24x7 FLR. Our thing is more I come up with a scene without discussing it with him at all, and then I put him through it. Afterwards we will talk about it. When we are not scening, we have a pretty normal relationship (except I am getting more and more dommie with him as time goes by. Ha Ha!). He never knows when a scene is about to be sprung on him, and he has never complained about one yet (except the exercise last weekend!).

Anyways, after that first time putting him in panties, during debrief he told me how he was incredibly humiliated to be put into them, but that he gets tremendously aroused being tremendously humiliated, so he loves me. If you turn your head sideways while standing on one foot you can see the sense in that. He said it's been a fantasy of his for as long as he can remember, being "forced" into panties, or being "caught" in panties and spanked for it, but that he didn't dare raise it with me thinking I would go all freaky on him. Silly boy. Mildly insulting to me.

Hey, if he loves his panties, who am I to say no? It's a small enough thing, really, and rife with opportunity. If such a simple thing can humiliate the piss out of him, then go for it, I say.

I quickly took him out panty shopping (a couple of times now), embarrassing the heck out of him each time. I also got him into skirt and panties for some girlie sex from me (he had to clutch his little panties at his knees while he took it right down his throat and balls deep up his ass like a good little slut should). Later I added forced sashaying and bra and lingerie based corner time. I even had him in bra and panties the first time Sue saw him all cute and subby. I know, give me an inch and I'll take a mile!

The thing is, I don't get it. I have a whole drawer full of panties myself. Some nicer than others, some sexier than others, but they really don't "turn me on". They're underwear. I hope some of them turn him on because they show me off nicely, but I really don't get it.

Physically, they're not that different from a swimsuit, from his underwear, or even gym shorts. How kinky would it be if I put on a pair of his underwear? Why would I want to? Would I get all hot and bothered and super embarrassed? No. I don't get it. I wear bra and panties most every day. And so? And what about cross-dressing? If I wear one of his T-shirts, it's because mine are all in the wash.

Mind you, david has a low tolerance for being embarrassed.  He was so embarrassed the first time he was standing bare in front of my sister showing off his penis and testicles (there's nothing to be ashamed of there, really, but he was blushing up a storm). And he was so embarrassed that time I took his pants down in front of his trainer. He did everything to hide his front from her. Ha Ha! Other guys too. I was at a pool party when I was 16 where a guy got totally pantsed, all his stuff on show. He was so awkward! Would I be embarrassed if I was nude in public? No way. I love getting naked! Before I started spanking him we were at a "clothing optional" beach together. I was bare in like 3 seconds. He wouldn't get out of his swimsuit! Oh boy, if we ever go back there again I'll have him out of his swimsuit in 3 seconds flat and right across my knee for a fanny warmer!

Last weekend for his workout I put him into a pair of his panties. I can honestly they didn't turn me on or turn me off in any way. They were just short shorts. They did have the advantage of being flimsy and riding up his ass so there was more to whip. And it was amusing when he was doing push-up burpees and his cock and balls kept flopping out. Ha Ha!

But I figure that as his domme, I don't need to understand why being put into panties turns him on so much, I just need to know that it does turn him on, and keep doing it to him.

Of course, I'm being disingenuous. Ultimately, it does turn me on, because I know I am realizing this deep dark secret fantasy of his, getting him wildly excited, letting other women know he is subject to "panty training" by his wife. His excitement at all of that turns me on incredibly. Also, I get turned on humiliating him, especially in front of other women (am I a bad girl for that?). If panties and a bra humiliate him, then I'm all in on it, I don't need to understand why, I just need to see those blushes keep coming.

All for the price of a pair of panties. Cheapest sex toy going.

So I say, vive les petites culottes!

A Real Workout Whacking!

As I mentioned previously, david's trainer has left us to go on to greener pastures. I have a new trainer lined up, but she is not available until mid-March. david has not seen her yet. She is also a bikini model of all things. I guess he will like that! She seems open minded and fun, but very strict and knowledgeable, and I think I will move to her as well (I have been getting various trainers to try them out, and she is my fave so far).

In the meantime, I'm not going to let david completely slack off, so I am encouraging him to exercise on his own, which he has been doing, but not as much as he should.

Last weekend I decided that on Sunday morning he and I would hit our gym in the basement. I was inspired by a piece of artwork from Banjo's BBS and decided to recreate this scene in our basement gym. You will see it at the end of this post. It's so hard finding images that match what I do to david, and I want images for you guys to see, so this time I thought I would match what I do to david to an image I have already found! Very smart, no?

I woke him up in the morning and told him to get into his gym clothes as we were working out. He groaned and tried to go back to sleep, but I kicked his lazy little behind out of bed and told him I was going to be his trainer today and he better mind me, or else! I think the fact that I had the riding crop in my hand helped settle matters.

He got up and started to get into his red gym shirt, undies and blue shorts. I stopped him and told him "wrong outfit." I told him the shirt was fine, but it was to be panties and bare legs for you, mister, and I wanted to see those panties soaked by the time we were done working out. I picked out a pair of his pink panties for him and watched him dress himself as I got into my most sexy Lululemon crop and sports bra - my ass is so cute in those pants even I like looking at it in the mirror!

Not me, unfortunately, but you get the idea!

Then I told him military-style to "get your pantied ass into gear!" He went downstairs as I cropped his bare legs all the way down the stairs. At one point he stopped, looked really pained, and looked back at me with his chin up. It was an "Ow, that was too hard" look. I've seen it before. "Move" I said in my most threatening tone. He lowered his chin and kept moving. Victory for moi. When we were in the gym, I told him he would be paying for that little act of defiance for the next hour.

I made him put on his white socks and runners, and his heart rate monitor chest strap. I held onto the watch so I could see if he was working. So silly in red shirt, pink panties, white socks and runners, with bare legs between. He had a nice welt on his leg from where I had cropped him hard before.

The first thing I did was to make him run stairs. I stayed at the bottom and got him to run up and down six flights of stairs four times.

Each time he reached the bottom, I made him bend over, lower his own panties, grab his own ankles, and gave him 10 hard and fast ones right across both bare cheeks that really made him suffer and cry out like a baby. He knew that each time he got back down from his painful run, he'd have 10 more painful stripes across his bare ass. That must have been fun for him, although you couldn't tell by looking at him. By the time he got done with his fourth, his heart rate was up past 170, he was gasping for breath (no worries, his HRmax is more like 185), and his ass was sooo marked up! What was hilarious was that his heart rate maintained and even went up a bit during his cropping.

Then I put him through 3 sets of 15 burpees with a push-up, 15 squats with the 25lb weights held above his shoulders, and a 1 minute plank. Boy was he complaining. What a wimp. During his plank I lowered his little pink panties so that he was doing a bare-butt plank. If he raised his ass at all, it got cropped hard. Left some more stripes from that!

That superset took way longer than it should have because he kept procrastinating. I don't get it. You're there to exercise, it's 'gona hurt, so just exercise. Don't complain!

Next I got out the stability ball, and had him do 3 sets of 15 chest flies with the 20lb weights, 30 crunches on the ball, and 20 back extensions. As he was doing his flies, he has to keep his butt up. The crop encouraged him nicely.

Again, way longer than it should have, but I was insisting on good form.

As a topper, I had him run in place, knees up high, until his HR was back up at 170. If those knees didn’t get high enough, well, you guessed it, he got the crop whipped hard across the seat of his panties!

By this time he was looking pretty rung out and well whipped. Good thing was that he had indeed soaked his pink panties with his sweat. I had kept his HR above 140 the whole time - when it got down to 145 I told him to get his ass in gear on the next set and whipped him hard with the crop wherever I could reach on him on each HR drop. He jumped at those whippings and got moving. As a result, his legs and ass were covered with little crop marks and welts. His welts were pretty vivid on those parts of his legs I don’t usually whip. I enjoyed marking him like that.

I helped him stretch himself out. Mainly on his tummy, I slid my thigh underneath his leg, and bent his leg back towards his butt. I like that stretch for myself a lot, and it really takes two to make it work properly. And I could admire the marks!

At this point we were an hour in (yes, he's slow, so slow! I would have easily done 3 supersets with higher reps and gotten 10 mins. of cardio in to boot in the time he did 2 supersets). Oh well, he's just a guy, what can I expect? No reason not to punish him for it, though. I sat down on the weight bench and pulled him across my lap. I took his soaked panties down to his knees, clamped my leg over both of his, grabbed his wrist behind his back, and hand-spanked his slow and lazy ass as hard as I bloody well could!

I rode him hard, and put him away wet. Just like a good training session should be.

So what do you guys think? Should I start a "Julie's Personal Training" business? Make it a franchise maybe? Any takers? Ha Ha!

You Would If You Loved Him

In the comments, a number of guys bemoan the fact that my david is so lucky to have me. Well yes he is, but no reason to give up on your mate!

I just finished reading a great e-book called "Sex, Fetish and Him". It's an insightful discussion of "sexual paraphilia" (the dirty nasty and fun fetishes we and our partners are all into ;-). It's targeted at reluctant wives and makes a compelling case for why we ought to be catering to our men's kinks and how to go about doing it effectively. You can buy it from Amazon and other places as an e-book for about $10.

It's by a woman named Jackie Castro. She's a professional psychologist, pro-domme, wife, and self-confessed spanko. What a combo!

It describes my david to a tee, and contains lots of terrific advice on how to dig out of him all the subtle little ins and outs of his fetish. If you are a guy and have a partner who is reluctant, this is the book to give them; if it doesn't get them spanking you, nothing will!

When talking about what it takes for a woman to participate in her man's kink, she says

I think the two most important requirements are an open mind and a sense of adventure... Participation requires education, creativity and planning. That's a lot more work than most women have to do in the bedroom.

Yes! I take the trouble to get into his fantasies and explore them at the really detailed level he loves, and then "act" them out (part of "his thing" is to pretend it is not an act, and I am happy to oblige). It's fun and fulfilling, and I found that it turns me on too (in great part because it turns him on so much). She advises,

Never make him beg for fetish play. That's something he'll find off-putting and cause him to harbor resentment.

That is important. I make it a point to cater to his kinky desires on a regular basis. J advises to treat it like cooking an exceptional meal. You need to prepare and work hard but then you can take great satisfaction in the result. I love david soooo much, and this thing is so much more important to him than any stupid meal could ever be, so it deserves way more effort from me, not less (besides, I don't like cooking!)

J had some great advice on how to go deeper into david's brain. She gave me a method, including questions to ask and lessons on how to listen and perceive that I suppose are "tricks of the trade" for psychologists. She introduced the subject as follows.

... it's you and your guy who need to communicate to pinpoint the nuances ... it's not enough for him to paint broad pictures of his fetish. As they say, the devil is in the details... you need to guide him into being very precise and descriptive about his desires so you can tailor them to his fantasies and ultimately reenact the scenario he sees in his head.

I did this with david, and oh my, the absolutely filthy degenerate things that are going on in his little mind you would not believe! I LOVE it. Ammunition for me!

In describing dominant and submissive roles, J says,

A Dominant has a very important, substantial role: she is the protector, teacher, and lover to the submissive.

I would add the traditional Catholic "mommy" and "whore" to the list. Ha Ha!

J has several chapters on the various common fetishes (20 plus miscellaneous). I can slot my man perfectly into 9 of them. It's like she's known him longer than I have. It's scary! In J's terminology, my david is into the following (with some choice insightful quotes of hers attached).

• FemDom Domestic Disciplinary Relationships
• "To most, the idea of punishment is what makes the lifestyle exciting. You set the rules and he's held accountable for his actions."
• "The very act of lying over your knee is demeaning and effective for changing an 'uppity' attitude."
• "Some women feel a sense of power with a strap-on protruding from their pelvis... Now you get to do the fucking. Wield your complete and total power and have him suck your strap-on before you use it on him... Ever wonder what it feels like to be a man? Now is your chance to experience intercourse as the one who inserts. You can make him really feel like a woman by fucking him in the ass."
• Spanking
• "I'm not exaggerating when I tell you that spanking fetishists require spanking in their lives. Your guy probably wishes he didn't have this desire, but it will never go away."
• "In reality, spanking will never make an adult or even a child do something they aren't on board with. The paddle will not make your spouse take out the garbage... However, 'the threat of the paddle' can be an enjoyable tool in the context of play and certainly can make chores more fun for the spanking fetishist."
• Humiliation
• "Submissive males like yours interpret humiliation as an expression of their devotion."
• Threesomes and Multiple Partners
• "Unfortunately, no matter how much we wish it weren't true, it is. Men do think and fantasize about other women. It's a tough, bitter little pill to swallow, but it's essential if you want to truly participate in his inner sexual world."
• Cross-Dressing
• "Guys who think about cross-dressing within the context of embarrassment or humiliation have a completely different mindset. For them, cross-dressing is not done as a hobby or stress reliever but it's seen as punishment... The point is to put down his masculinity by making him wear 'girly' clothes."
• Ass and Anal Play
• "In this scenario, he doesn't 'want' to stick his tongue in your ass but is 'commanded' to perform the act..."
• Bedroom Talk
• "BT doesn't mean that you'll necessarily do everything you say. It's all about weaving a verbal fantasy about things you know he desires and thinks about in private."
• Female Sexual Dominance
• "Sexual dominance is all about attitude. You are the initiator and the director of the sexual interactions. You call the shots and allow yourself to be the recipient of ultimate pleasure."
• Sexual Role Playing
• "Sexual role playing is fun, enjoyable and lets you to step out of yourself for a few hours."

In addition to these, I'm totally into golden showers, but have not really gone there with david because they are not his thing. But reading this book I can say to heck with it, he's getting pee'd on!

On the "Multiple Partners" front I've gotten Sue involved in this, which runs counter to J's advice, but it's worked out nonetheless. I will definitely be giving her this book to read because it explains certain things way better than I ever could. J suggests seeking out a pro for a kinky threesome as a safe alternative. I have decided that we should do that so that we can let Sue go at her own pace with no even implicit pressure from us. I will set david with the task of lining that up! Ha Ha!

Anyways, a terrific book. Well worth the read!

Panty Gagging

Quick little post to catch you all up.

A number of you have asked after Rebecca, david's personal trainer. I'm afraid Rebecca has left town to pursue her muse. Ah well, it was nice while it lasted. She was keen at first, but then got very serious afterwards, and did not pick up on the more playful side of things, and I did not want to push. I am lining up a new girl for david, and will see if we can have some fun with her. In the meantime I have been training with a cute fellow at the gym, though he kicks my butt, which I'm not sure I like...!

Sister Sue came by once since the last time. I knew she was coming so I punished david with a spanking before she got here (I always have a few "punishable offences" saved up for just such an occasion), and had him doing corner time when she came in. I made it extra squirmy for him by fastening a panty gag in his mouth. Poor baby. How humiliating for him!

Otherwise he was all nude with his cute little red caboose on show.

I left him there for what must have been a half hour as Sue and I made tea in the kitchen, brought it out to the living room, chatted, moved around the house. I totally ignored david and told Sue to ignore him also as he was being punished. She did ask him "were you a naughty boy, david?" and he had to answer "Yes Ma'am" through his panty gag.

Halfway through Sue's visit I told david that his punishment was over and he was free to go. david ran up the stairs to the bedroom and Sue and I got a little laugh at his bobbing erection and wiggly red backside as he scampered.

I love showing Sue how in charge I am of david. It turns me on something fierce!