My husband and I are now in our forties (him more than me), and our sex drives have crossed over. I got used to, in my teens, twenties, and thirties, to being an object of desire and constantly fending off boys and men my age. Now I'm monogamous and have a higher sex drive than him, and am reduced to literally begging him for partner sex. So humiliating.
And it's not just for now. Its forever! It's so unfair. He seems to be getting more and more handsome and exciting to me with age (Daddy fetish), and I know I'm getting less and less desirable with age. That's not being self-deprecating, it's just true. I would not be able to compete sexually for men with me at twenty. So as he peaks in desirability and attractiveness, and as his sex drive drops; and I decline in sexual desirability, yet my sex drive peaks; I am more and more at his sexual mercy. Bummer.
I have been doing a lot of masturbation lately, but the other day I spied him looking handsome and rugged, doing a manly activity, and felt a little gush in my panties and tingle in my pussy. I wanted his cock in me, and his mouth on me.
So I told myself, ok, I need to make an effort. That evening I bathed with my nicest bubble bath (he likes the smell). Then I dressed in virginal white stockings, garter belt, silky panties, pretty bra, and high heels. I went to him where he was watching TV and just stood there, off a bit to his side, eyes downcast, and just waited submissively hoping he would be filled with desire and lustily fuck me! He looked over at me, smirked a little, and turned back to his show. I could see he checked "time remaining", which was about 8 minutes or so.
"excuse me..." I said softly.
"Shhh! Stay!" He said, without even looking back at me. My face blushed hot. I felt ridiculous, teetering on my heels, calves stretched, ass pushed out, feeling a little chilly wearing nothing but my "sexy" (supposedly!) lingerie. Then he hushes me and tells me to "stay", like a dog. I got a bit angry also. I considered storming off. He can't treat me like this! But I also realized he was playing a dominance game with me, so I just stood there, blushing hotly, and took it, as I was meant to: a pet awaiting its treat.
Is there any better proxy for the decline in my sexual attractiveness and his libido then that he made me stand there in humiliation for 8 minutes? Preferring his TV show over ravishing me on the spot? I felt myself ridiculous, and viscerally felt the shift in sexual power in our relationship. I had become the supplicant, and he the decider as to if and when I would receive the sex I craved.
He made me wait there for the full, long, 8 minutes of his show. When the episode ended he paused it and turned to me and said, "have you something you want to ask me?"
"May I have sex please, Sir?"
"Are you horny?" He asked me, unnecessarily.
"Yes Sir."
"Come over here. Lower your panties. Let's have a look."
I blushed anew, went to right beside where he was seated, and lowered my panties, exposing my pussy to him. He licked his fingertips, rubbed my pussy, and slipped his fingers inside.
"Ohhhh..." I moaned as my knees buckled a little and a flush of shame washed over me.
"Your vagina feels very wet inside."
"Yes Sir."
"You know, that at your age, it's utterly ridiculous that you work yourself up like this and then embarrass yourself begging for sex. Where's your fucking dignity?"
"I'm sorry Sir," I say practically in tears from his harsh, but true, words.
"Get across my knee. You're getting a spanking for behaving like such a whore."
"Yes Sir!"
He moved to the center of the couch and I draped myself across his knee. He took my heels off and then took my panties off my legs. I always dress with panties over garter belt for ease of access.
"This getup looks utterly ridiculous on you. It's intended for a much younger woman, maybe on her honeymoon. You have no business, at your age, wearing nonsense like this."
"I'm sorry Sir! I was trying to be sexy for you..."
"Well act and dress your age. And what the hell is this?" He asked as he spread my ass cheeks and put his fingers down between my pussy. "Is this fucking constant with you? Do you walk around in the streets with a wet fucking pussy?"
"I can't help it!" I cried out as I almost involuntarily parted my legs a bit to allow him better access.
"Shameless!" he said and spanked my ass. "Remember why you're getting this spanking."
"Because I'm a slut, sir?"
"You're not a 'slut', but you're sure dressing like one and acting like one. I'll not have my wife dressing like a whore around this house."
"But I need it, sir, so bad!"
"The only thing you need is a damned good spanking!"
He started in giving me my spanking. His large, strong hand felt very hard as he spanked me with his usual pattern, left cheek, right cheek, middle.
I'm sure my ass was very well-framed with my stockings and garter, which I hoped turned him on, despite the disgust in me he was feeling.
The spanks grew in intensity, well beyond "playful". I felt I was being punished. Punished for acting like a needy, whorey, slut, instead of a proper and demure wife. I deserved it. I deserved it all... But the very worst thing, the most shameful thing, was that even my punishment was turning me on! Those middle strokes especially, delivered low, sent shockwaves through my pussy and asshole that had me arching up, in lewd display, begging for more. I started writhing across his lap as he forcefully reddened my ass without mercy or respite. I had used poor judgment and had over-stepped the bounds of propriety and was being punished by my husband for it.
"Please Sir! Please!" I cried out as my spanking proceeded. "Mercy, please!" I begged. "I only wanted sex! And I only wanted to please you! Please!"
My appeal seemed to have worked because he stopped spanking me and began caressing my ass and private parts. I could feel his erection pushing against me. He stroked my pussy, which was getting wetter and wetter. I could even smell my own excitement.
"Getting a little desperate, are you?" He asked as he put his left hand around me and up against my pussy while his right finger fucked me. I answered his rhetorical question by humping his hand.
He took his fingers out from my pussy and rubbed my wetness onto my ass. "I think you need more spanking, first."
"Oh no!" I protested.
He moved me to straddle his knee which put my clitty directly against his hard thigh.
In this position his spanks were better able to reach the insides of my cheeks and my thighs. He's never too careful with his fingertips with me like this and they catch my asshole and pussy lips. Of course, I'm so busy humping his leg that I barely register it.
"You're wetting my pant leg, you little tart," he says as he starts spanking my ass more harshly. "After we're done, you're doing the laundry, and you better pre-treat that stain."
"Yes Sir! I'm sorry Sir!"
He pauses my spanking and strokes and penetrates my pussy with his fingers.
"What kind of sex do you want?" He asks me.
"Fuck my pussy? And lick it? Sir."
He spits on my asshole and shoves a finger up into my ass.
"Not ass sex?" He asks me as he roots around in there roughly. "I would think a little whore like you would want ass sex."
"Yes Sir, if that's what you want, then I want it too!"
"But you don't want it yourself?"
"No Sir. I want it. I want your big cock splitting my ass until it hurts so bad!" I lied. Hey, beggars can't be choosers.
"You're just fibbing now, but I appreciate the effort. Now get on your knees and get my cock in your mouth and prove to me you deserve to have your pussy fucked."
"Yes Sir!' I say as I slide off his knee and slither myself between his spread legs. I undo his belt, unfasten and unzip his pants, and pull them and his boxers down his legs and all the way off. His cock is hard already, from having given me my spanking. I take him in my mouth and suck and slurp and kiss and caress, making eye contact whenever I can.
"Take off that bra. Let me see your tits," he says.
I do that right away, baring my chest, and continuing to suck him. He reaches his hands down and plays roughly with my breasts and my nipples. Squeezing, kneading, pinching, twisting.
"That's enough. I don't want to cum in your mouth. I want to cum in your cunt."
"Yes Sir!" I say eagerly.
He stands. He looks around the room. He grabs a throw pillow and carries it to the back of the sofa. He puts it in top and has me bend over it. My hands are down on the seat cushion. My ass is in the air. He gets behind me and plunges his big hard cock into my oh so wet pussy.
Even as excited as I am, the initial penetration and deep thrusts are painful. And my position is not at all comfortable, bent over like that, the top of the couch cutting into my middle despite the consideration of the throw pillow, my head lowered.
"Ah! Ah! Oh! Oh!" I cry out on each deep thrust.
"Do you want to get fucked or not?" He asks me angrily.
"Yes Sir! Please fuck my needy little cunt!"
"Do you want me to lighten up?" he asks, still with an edge in his voice.
"No Sir! Please fuck me hard and deep!"
"Well I stand corrected. I guess you are nothing more than a needy little slut."
"Yes Sir!"
He continues dicking me down over the back of the couch, but it's getting easier to bear as my pussy enlarges and elongates and further lubricates to take the rough sex.
He gives me another 20 or so hard deep pumps and pulls out. He pushes my head down towards the sofa seat. My feet lift. He spreads my legs and kneels between them, his two arms support and lift and clamp down on my thighs. He holds me like that while splaying my legs widely apart. He puts his tongue to my cunt and starts licking me.
"Oh Fuck!" I say. It's a really good pussy position. His tongue reaches deep!
I guess I was well prepared, because pretty soon he bee-lines to my clit and licks it directly and roughly, and I feel myself completely cumming! I usually take longer, but I guess my spanking and my rough fucking... As I came hard I cried out and felt my legs kicking in the air, like a little froggy.
He stands, grabs my hips, and plunges his penis back into me. I'm soooo sensitive right after I've cum. He doesn't care. He rails me painfully into the couch as I hang on for dear life, feet still dangling off the ground. After maybe another twenty painfully deep pumps he nuts inside of me.
He pulls out, but keeps me dangling where I am. He puts his hand on my cunt and then digs his fingers deep inside. "What a sloppy mess," he says. "You're certainly not as tight as you used to be." Oh... that hurt... I'm just trying to catch my breath. He pulls his hand out and puts it in front of my face.
"Eat it," he orders me, "or so help me I'll take out my belt and whip your sorry old ass black and blue."
"Yes Sir!" I obediently lick up the contents of his hand, a heady mixture of his cum and my pussy juices. He reaches back behind me, digs in, and then repeats the procedure, feeding me from his palm. I feel the looseness in my pussy.
"Is this what little whores eat?" He asks me.
"Yes Sir!"
He reaches inside again, gets another palmful, and rubs it all over my face.
"You dirty little whore. You should fucking act your age. I'm ashamed I married a little slut like you."
I feel the shame of his words penetrate me as he literally rubs my face in it.
He releases me, stands me up, leaves me there, puts his boxers back on, sits back on the couch, and moves onto the next episode. I collect up my panties, my bra, my heels, and his pants, and I leave silently as he watches his show intently. I have laundry to do.
Wait! Wait! Wait! Before you go, and I leave you with an impression of my darling David being a total asshole, we did do this, but it was a total scene that I requested!
I'll rewind a bit. We were discussing our respective sex drives and I shared with him my insecurities of how he's just getting hotter while I'm getting less and less so. Like a good husband, while he thanked me for saying he was getting hotter, he disagreed that I was any any less hot at all and said, in his eyes, I am hotter than ever. He also scolded me that his sex drive was just fine, thank you, and just because he didn't want it every hour on the hour like an eighteen-year-old didn't mean he didn't have a more than adequate sex drive, thank you very much, and that I was a world-class handful to keep up with. He told me I could go out and fuck all the young men I wanted if that's important to me, but I jealously told him that I only wanted him to fuck me (I really don't want anybody else, and certainly don't want to feel obligated to let him fuck younger girls!)
I suggested why don't we work out my anxieties in a scene? I came up with the broad outlines of the scene I reported above, but left it to him to improvise a lot of it. Basically it was to have me do my best to seduce him, and him ignoring me and treating me like dirt while scolding me and punishing me for being such a dirty slut. I also asked him to shame me for still being a slut "at my age", and to compare me to younger girls, especially the tightness of my pussy... I did stipulate a pussy fuck and a tongue licking as part of it because my being horny was 100% true!
It was a great scene, and GREAT SEX! I did get to explore some of those negative thoughts and feelings I get, and did feel it was healthy playing out some of my worst fears. Maybe I should get in a gorgeous younger woman, a young escort maybe, and play out a "cuck queen" scene with her. Have both of them tease me for being old and undesirable, worthy only of sloppy seconds? Nah! Who am I kidding? I'm the Queen!
So, yeah, ok, ok, don't worry, I know I'm still pretty hot and can reel in a guy if I wanted. And my husband does still worship me as he should, but it's healthy to explore one's insecurities, no?
With David, when he lost that erection with Paula, we turned it into a D/s game and it was good. Sort of the same, right?
What do you guys think? Is playing with your insecurities a positive thing or do you think it's just nuts to do so? And was David a gentleman for catering to me, or did he go too far? Should he have flatly refused to do that scene? Let me know in the comments!