Spanking Reality and Spanking Fantasy

One of my two main motivations for becoming a r/l spanked wife is the amazing enhancement to my sex life and my fantasy life that it brings about. The other is that it makes me feel like I'm being cared for which in turn feels good on the insides and keeps the blues away. I know that if I mope around and don't get my chores done, I'll get my attitude corrected real fast!

I know what her hands are doing!

It's been well over a year now since I asked my husband to start spanking me for real, My husband and I first made the formal decision to introduce spanking into my real-life in April of 2020.

Embracing Female Domestic Discipline

While I started out as a pure dominant, the prior two and a half years we switched frequently and kept it very even. We both played with real-life incidents as fodder for scenes, so that blurred the distinction between scening and real-life discipline. But there was one incident at the start of COVID that crossed a line where he absolutely spanked me for real.

Julie Spanked for Being Irresponsible

Everyone was super paranoid about COVID back then, and I had broken our family agreement by going out and buying ice cream for myself (instead of restricting our grocery shopping to once per week), and then lying flippantly about it to David. When I would not back down, he spanked me. I specifically shouted, out loud, that I did not consent, as I was not playing and not consenting to play!

I don't recommend this for most people. It's the sort of thing that could easily lead to an assault charge and a divorce. But with our long history of role-playing exactly these sorts of punishments, our comfort with it, and with both of us experienced with the physical act of spanking, I think those are all mitigating circumstances.

And I did not try to use my safeword, and I don't know what would have happened had I done so. I didn't want to give him the satisfaction as it would have been some sort of admission that we were playing, which I was not and I knew that he knew that. And also, I was 'kinda turned on by his real-life dominance and a big part of me didn't want it to stop. Nowadays we have norms for this. He has blanket consent, regardless of what I may say, but would stop, for safety's sake, if I used my red safeword.

As I knew that David read my blog, I wrote with more contrition than I actually felt about that incident. What truly happened (as you can read a bit between the lines there), was that I continued thinking it was overblown and everybody was reacting ridiculously despite my spanking. However, that spanking made me shade the truth and say I was in the wrong (though I felt I was not, truly), apologize to everybody (my Mom and Dad included, who were made aware of my spanking, at my instigation), and changed my behaviour so as to avoid another spanking for that same reason. It's kind of humiliating admitting that...

And then, somewhat, though not entirely, to my surprise, rather than being angry at him over it, I found myself ridiculously turned on by it. And it just felt right submitting to him like this. I think he knew I really wanted to be taken-in-hand, and when the opportunity presented, and he thought he was 100% justified and I was being a brat, he pulled the trigger on that.

It was not without some preparation leading up to it. I had done a little study and essay on Christian Domestic Discipline previously on my blog.

Christian Domestic Discipline

David had read it and we discussed it. At the time I was intrigued by it, but didn't want it. I changed my mind since, and he says he saw it coming before I did. Hardly an excuse to beat your wife, though! What's the statute of limitations on wife spanking? :-)

Since we agreed to me being his spanked wife, he has spanked me multiple times "for cause". I've blogged about each and every one of them. I still think the last spanking I received was a bit unjustified, but you won't catch me saying that to him, or repeating the behaviour that got me spanked, and that's all he-who-must-be-obeyed requires of me.

Spankings in general, but r/l disciplinary spankings in particular, make me horny as all get out. It makes traditional vanilla-type sex very appealing to me, and I want nothing more than to serve him in the sack afterwards and have him take me however he pleases. My orgasm almost doesn't matter, it's such a strong urge in me.

As well, those r/l spankings, while few and far between, fuel my fantasy life like crazy. Our play spankings are much richer for it, because I know exactly the mind of a spanked wife, and sink into that during play. I'm also a better Domme for it. As well, I have become an addict of domestic male-spanks-female porn. Novels, short stories, letters to the editor, drawings, photos, and videos. I use that material and I masturbate to it. I never did that with female-tops-male stuff.

Why do I masturbate when I have such total access to my husband? Well, at this point in our lives, our sex drives are mismatched. I'm always wanting it, more than ever, and he's slowing down. This is all pretty normal, apparently, and there it is.

But beyond this, masturbation is a different and distinct pleasure apart from partner sex. It allows my imagination to roam, and the physicality of masturbation is different. I can immediately adjust the timing and the stimulation, and I can be 100% selfish. Plus, masturbation is embarrassing to me. I feel guilty and I feel naughty doing it. And that plays back into my own sexual excitement and the fantasies I am fueling. I always feel especially ridiculous turning over and sticking my bum up high as I masturbate, imagining I am being spanked publicly, completely on display, which is my biggest, most fixated, fantasy.

The most recent thing I masturbated to was a video on spankingtube by a man with the handle agoodspankin. He seems to have a podcast that I am getting into, Never Too Old For Agoodspankin, and has published three books under the name Bob Sacamano, but I can't seem to buy them anywhere (wahhhh!).

He has years of full length spanking videos posted. And all the girls are so sweet and submissive! Makes me squishy to think I'm somewhat like them. And they are also so pretty! And he is a great scolder, favours OTK, and looks to have a very hard hand, which turns me on immensely. The distress in the girls (alongside their reddening bums) is very real which is also a super major turn-on for me. I've been there and done that, and this helps me relive it vividly.

If I had to pick a favourite so far, I guess it's a relatively recent three-parter starting with Learning The Rules part 1. The girl, Haomi, is being trained in the rules of the house. What better way to conduct a training session than draped across his knee?

She is reminded of the house rule of leaving the bathroom doors closed so that the cat does not attack the toilet paper. She is reminded to answer his questions with a simple "yes, Sir", or "no, Sir" and not to give an explanation unless requested. All the while she is draped across his knee having her butt fondled. I love her positioning with her butt made to arch up, and the fact she is clutching his leg for the extra connection. She does that a lot throughout. I do that also.

I especially love his hands...

His left arm and hand is strong, and is controlling her securely in place. His fingers are reaching under, towards her sex. She is aware of that. His right hand is big and looks hard. Such a turn on. It's also the hand of an older man, which is also a turn on for me. His strict and dominant demeanour as he talks is another turn on. The anticipation of being in your shorts, knowing they are likely to be lowered at some point, is so exciting.

He begins spanking her, not for any reason, just to get her to be receptive to training. At one point she reaches back with her left hand and almost blocks his spanking. There is a short leather strap on the carpet in front of her. He tells her that if she reaches back and blocks his spanks, she'll have to open her hand and be strapped on it. She was fortunate she did not quite block him this time, and is warned not to again. To help her, he takes her hand and continued her spanking.

Look at how absolutely ridiculous she looks, and how dominant he looks. I keep thinking as I watch it, "this is the way to teach a girl her place". What a terrible thought for a "feminist"! But I want to be that girl. I want to be taught my place like her. The spanking is not light and she is bicycling her legs, clutching at him, and shouting and complaining during it, saying things like "no please!" It looks like she wants it, but has never experienced a spanking like this before. This spanking very much reminds me of my own punishment spankings. I am that girl. I am the one made to look ridiculous. I am the one being trained to his will. I am the one with the rapidly reddening bottom, clutching his leg, yelling out. He is my husband. He is being strict with me. He brooks no nonsense whatsoever from me. He is training me. He is training me in the most embarrassing way I can possibly imagine!

At a certain point she can't seem to take it anymore. There were many. many, very hard spanks preceding this point. It is utterly believable. She reaches behind with her uncontrolled hand and tries to block his swats.

Many spankers, even this one in earlier videos, work around the hand and keep telling her to move it over and over again. That always bugs me. In this case, however, she was told what would happen, and then it happens. She gets her hand strapped.

Three very hard strappings, directly to her open palm. She cries out during all of them and visibly flinches with the pain. She is being consequenced. During the entire rest of the lengthy and increasingly difficult spanking, she never reaches back again. I get turned on by a man who says how he's going to punish you, and then punishes you the way he says: zero tolerance. And what's most humiliating is that the training is effective. She's being trained like an animal. Actually, worse than an animal, like a slut. She's being slut trained. It's what I think of when I'm being punished. Most girls want nothing to do with being punished this way by a man. I am different because I crave sexually embarrassing punishments, like a slut. And this is how sluts are trained.

Part 2 carries on with her shorts being lowered.

No matter how much I expect it, my pants coming down always adds an extra layer of humiliation to my punishment. And if he's already established how hard his hand can be over my pants, the pulling down of my pants can only mean it's about to get a lot worse. And boy does it ever, for her at least!

He continues spanking her unrelentingly with only his hard hand. During this part of her spanking he reinforces his rules and her expected behaviour. She seems to have been put in a seriously receptive frame of mind. I often talk about how hard my husband's hand is and how you guys have no idea. This video gives you a bit of an idea. Midway through, her panties follow her pants.

Off her butt, down past her knees, to her ankles, and then all the way off. And yes, I can testify that despite having experienced this many, many times, it remains embarrassing always. My panties were protecting nothing but my modesty. Now I am not even being spared that. For me, it's partly because grownups have little concern for a child's modesty, and I am being treated as if I was a child in this regard.

But more than this. My bare bottom, my pussy, my bottom hole, my breasts, I am the one who controls to whom and when those are displayed, and I use that discretion to exercise power and control over men. Most men will never be graced with my allowing that. I know they all want it. But they won't get it. It is my power. Only the man who goes to extreme grovelling lengths may be permitted it, and even then it may be withdrawn at any time, and upon my whim.

However, here is a man who takes it. It's not "at my pleasure and discretion". It's at his! And if he chooses to do this to me in front of other men, they too will be allowed to see me like this. Not only bared, but completely humiliated!

Her spanking continues as she struggles frantically across his knee.

At a certain point, as they are reviewing the rules, she says "no more...". He says, "we'll see about no more!" and tells her to pass him the hairbrush in front of her. She complains and begs, and points out that it's not a hairbrush (it's more like a bathbrush, I guess). He clearly wants to make an impression on her, and her "joking around" like that just tells him he's not yet done enough.

In part 3 he has the brush in hand.

She is still being a "smartass" about the brush so he decides to transform her experience into a true punishment spanking, as he needs her to take this seriously. He ups the ante and lays into her with that brush!

She becomes frantic! She's not "playing around" anymore. At this stage her legs go flying and the audience is treated to a bare pussy show-off dance. After a bit of this she becomes very sure that there is nothing funny about her training and she now understands how seriously she is intended to take it. What started off as a simple training spanking ended as a genuine punishment spanking, and she only had herself to blame.

She's then sent to the corner, told to stay there until told otherwise, where she nurses her sore buns.

I've been there myself, with my buns in exactly that same state after a harsh punishment from my husband. It makes the porn so much more real to me.

While I really loved the dynamic of that one, and her frantic reactions to her spanking, I didn't orgasm to any of that, but it got me in the mood. I had my orgasm watching a different video of his, and the thing that got me off was the girl's position. Oh my gosh! It's my nightmare scenario. You'll see what I mean.

In this scenario I am more in my head than in the action in the video. Here's the scene I made up, inspired by the physicality of this video.

I have misbehaved horribly, at the cottage, in a way that impacted my entire family. My Mom and my Dad, my older and younger sisters, my younger brother, all their partners, all my nephews and nieces, and my husband. I was irresponsible with the power boat and wrecked it for the summer, so nobody gets to play water sports.

My husband has already informed me that I'll be getting a spanking later on, in front of the entire family. I beg him not to, but he is adamant. He explains to any of them that don't already know that, at my own request, I am a spanked wife, and that means he decides my discipline, whether I like it or not. Since I impacted everyone, for the whole summer, I will be punished in front of everyone with a good old fashioned spanking right on my bare butt. The nephews and nieces titter. The men smile. The women nod their heads in approval.

I am already in my bathing suit with a wrap. He takes my wrap off. He walks me over to the corner and puts my nose in it. He yanks my bikini bottoms down and then right off my legs. I blush furiously and push myself deeper into the corner. I hear gasps from the family. David admires his handiwork. There's one final touch, though. He reaches for my back, unties my bikini top, and pulls it off me. My arms go to my sides and I push even deeper into the corner so nobody can seeeeeee!

"You'll stay right there for a full hour and think about what you've done. After the hour, we'll all gather back here and your family can watch me give you your spanking."

He walks away, leaving me there, embarrassment beyond all belief.

For the next hour I have nothing to do but contemplate my fate. The whole family will gather in the living room. David will take me out of my corner, exposing me fully. Then he will take me across his knee and spank me like a child in front of everybody! Wahhhhh!

My hour is up and everybody is gathering in the living room, taking their seats, waiting for the show. David comes in. I turn my head to see what he's doing. He's taking a dining room chair and putting it at one end of the living room, side on to everybody watching. Oh no! My bare butt will be facing everybody! I determine to keep my legs glued tightly together during my spanking, to minimize my embarrassment.

Instead of sitting on the chair, David goes behind it and puts one foot up over the back and onto the seat. "Get over here!" he says to me.

Oh no. Not that. I turn and cover myself with my hands. "Please no," I beg. "Not like that. Not in front of everybody."

"Get over here, young lady. I'll make sure you put on a good show."

I shuffle over, the tears already forming. I glimpse my nephews ogling their Aunt's bare breasts, pussy, and ass. They can all see my pussy is completely shaved, my lips exposed. I stand in front of his knee, my doom. I'm about to be punished, like a child; naked, like a toddler. When I'm beside him, he pushes down on the back of my head and reaches his hand down between my legs to pull me up.

He hoists me up and over by my pussy!

This is so humiliating! With me balanced in place, he removes his hand and lectures me, and makes me answer him back as to why I am getting this spanking.

Literally everybody can see my pussy and my bumhole, fully exposed, as I am lectured and scolded and corrected. Are the boys and men thinking about what sex with me would be like?

I fixate on this part of the video, making up the above scene in my head to explain why I wind up like this in front of my entire extended family. I need the worked out scene to get off.

Just look at me! Look at me like that bent over showing off everything a girl has to show off. Then he begins my spanking. Before long, his hard hand drives me frantic! My legs are splaying wide, kicking in the air, accentuating my embarrassing exposure. My ass turns totally red, just from his hard palm. The embarrassment is not just the exposure, it's also that he makes me cry like a toddler, and beg him to stop, and apologize over and over again, and promise I'll be a good girl, a good girl!

Any respect anybody in the family had for me is completely gone. They've seen me embarrassingly spanked, like a naughty little girl, and that can never be unseen or forgotten by anybody in that room.

When he finishes with me, he keeps me there, red bottom fully exposed, as he concludes my scolding.

He asks if anybody in the family wishes to give me a swat or two as he holds me there. A queue forms. They all do, even my nieces! Sue, one of the first in line, parts my cheeks and spanks the untouched inner cheek flesh, between asshole and pussy. This encourages others, including my nephews (!) to do the same! David assists by making me spread my legs and by holding the other cheek wide as well, for maximal access.

David says I'll be spending another hour naked with my nose in the corner, but he's going to make sure it won't be a comfortable hour. He asks my Dad for that tube of Icy-Hot cream he keeps around. Dad cheerfully fetches it.

Together, still bent over David's knee, they apply it liberally to my rectum and my vagina, pushing the soon-to-be-burning cream deep up inside of me while everybody watches!!!!

Then, standing me up, Daddy grabs my breasts and applies it to my nipples as well while David holds me in place with my hands behind my back.

Then David leads me back to the corner and tells me firmly to stay there. It starts burning horribly and I am crying and squirming and dancing, standing there, big white patches of Icy-Hot on my breasts and pussy and up my bottom hole!

David leaves me there, telling my nephews to keep an eye on me, and if the effect seems to be wearing off, to call him back for a freshen up.

The first fifteen minutes are hell! The boys watch my every twitch and move. After about 30 minutes it starts to become bearable, but I dare not let on, not wanting a second application. So I dance and writhe in place, making a show of jutting my ass in and out and dancing in place, pretending the cream is continuing its intense burn.

One of my nephews, the eldest, yells out, "Uncle David! I think it's all worn off and she's just faking it now!"

"Oh, she is, is she?" He comes over to me, yanks me back across his knee, spanks my bum fast and hard, and then re-applies a second dosing of the cream to rectum, cunt, and tits, and sets me back in place, although this time, facing out into the room with my hands on my head!

The tears instantly come back and I am writhing in pure agony, my hands glued to the top of my head.

"See? That's the real thing," my eldest nephew says to the others.

This time, I don't need to fake it, as the stinging pain of the follow-up application persists to the end of my full hour's penance.

When David comes back to release me he asks the boys about it.

"You could see it was working that time!" my eldest nephew said, and the others agreed with him. "Aunty Julie was jiggling and dancing the whole time that time!"

David releases me to go to the kitchen and wash the Icy Hot out with the dish detergent and water. I run, not walk there, and clean myself out, digging deep, as the nephews and nieces look on. I then need to clean up the watery soapy mess I made of the floor, and am finally allowed to get dressed again, head held low in shame.

That whole fantasy scene formed in my mind. I go back and re-watch my hoisted up spanking, imaging my audience, and as I furiously rub my clitty with my fingers I come hard midway through her spanking...

What a naughty girl I am!

Thank you agoodspankin for your inspiration!