Monday, November 28

My Poor Baby!

There have been several requests for me to pose for a photo. I finally got my act together and figured out how the auto-timer thingy on the camera works. I dressed in one of my business suits, but with fishnets that I thought you would like, and I am holding my new strap. Sorry I can't show my face (the little "me picture" is actually me, photoshopped up a bit artistically to hide the guilty!). I hope you like the photo.


And here is a photo of my new strap (although a pen-pal, from the description, thinks it might actually be a "tawse"?)


In my last blog entry, Strapped!, I described david's first disciplinary strapping. I said then that I did not feel at all guilty. Well, I am feeling guilty now.

All the rest of the day my poor baby was walking around very gingerly, and wincing as he sat down. On Sunday he said his butt felt better but that his legs were still very stiff and sore. I looked at them, and they were much bruised. This morning, while we were still in bed, I had him turn over and I lowered his pyjamas to inspect. Oh My Goodness! They were even worse. Did I ever get carried away on Saturday!

He was no longer fire engine red, as he had been directly after his strapping, but there was still a discoloration all over his butt and legs, like a funny tan. But the worst of it was the bruises. Both his butt and legs had very angry-looking and very large purple and black bruising.  I saw the bruising come up as I was strapping him, but I didn't expect it would look like this a full two days later! I had reddened him and bruised him a bit before with the hairbrush, and it had gone away much more quickly.

Ok. I admit it here. I was wrong. I apologize. I should have used an implement I was familiar with, like the hairbrush, for his first real disciplining and saved the strap for more of a play spanking where I could take it easy on him at first and learn its ways.

I didn't apologize to him, exactly. That would have been counterproductive. I did, however, tell him that I was sorry I had to punish him so severely. An apology of sorts.

He then surprised me by apologizing to me for putting me in that position (!) and admitted that he had been deliberately "pushing the envelope" with his diary misbehaviour, and had gotten what was coming to him. He said he was sorry and would do everything he could to avoid a repeat performance. Awwww... my baby is so cute!

I told him I didn't want him exercising today, so I called Rebecca and told her he was ill. I had to pay her for the missed session, but I guess that's my penance. My original thought was that I wanted her to see the strap marks on his legs, but I sure didn't want her to see the bruising I had inflicted on him! She would not have understood - thought I was some kind of sadist - probably call the SPCA on me! By excusing him from exercising, it also let him off the hook from diary grading as he hadn't yet had enough time to change his ways and I really didn't want to have to strap him again so soon.

david thanked me for that, and joked that it was a real good licking he got. It's a funny word, "a licking", isn't it? I guess it means that the ends of the strap are like a tongue "licking" at his butt? I told him that to even things up, he could give me a real good licking also. He knew what I meant. When I ask for a licking, it's with his head down between my legs!

So, in summary, I do feel bad about being an "uncontrolled spanker" and vow to do better in future.

That having been said, and given that david, my poor baby, seems ok despite all, I will admit that the severity of what I did to him turns me on. I guess I am a bit of a sadist. In fact I want nothing more now than to bend him over for a hard ass-fucking so that I can admire my handiwork, getting me nice and horny, and then have him give my wet pussy a good licking as I grind myself into his face.

However, I decided that I need to make amends, so I won't allow myself that pleasure. Instead, as punishment for me, I promise, publicly to all you horny guys out there reading this blog (which is kind of humiliating, because you are mostly all subbies), that I solemnly swear I will submit to a hard pussy fucking from him which he has not had for a while, and then give him the best blowjob ever (I hate cleaning my own pussy juices off his cock like that... yech!) letting him cum into my mouth, and that I will swallow every last drop like a good little tramp. I will even pretend to like it so he will think he is a real man, and won’t know I'm punishing myself. There. Hope you're all happy!

Oh, and I'll lay off the spanking until he heals, cross my heart!

23 comments:

  1. Excellent post!! My faith has been restored in you as a compassionate human being and as a "decent" wife for your hubby! After your previous post, I wondered what you would do to your hubby for a a SERIOUS transgression, since you really took delight in beating him for something MUCH LESS serious!!

    Live and learn and hopefully you will do just that!! There is a DIFFERENCE between fair, just chastisement and all-out abuse, which I think this was!! I think that you are just inexperienced and don't realize the POWER of implements when used inadvisedly!!! I imagine that he will be in significant pain for several days and be marked up for up to 2 weeks--all for the sake of diet and exercise!!

    But I commend you in seeing the error of your ways as an effective, adequate disciplinarian seeking his good in a positive manner without being overly HARSH!!

    Bob.

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  2. Julie,
    A) I like the vibe.
    B) Photo is great ( I am a professional and have photographed dominatrixes)
    C) That is a Tawse.
    D) Cruise Strict Janes site...she mentions 'moisturizing' as a preparation for spanking.
    :)

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  3. Nice photo Julie.
    But you don't fool me. You may not like all of that stuff, but I do think you want that pussy fucking :)

    Clarence

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  4. I may be in the minority here but I think the severity with which you dealt with David was healthy. It is true that you should know the capacity of an instrument before using it but a strap is safe compared to a cane or riding crop that do need caution. Most important, he learned what you are capable of doing and that is a lesson that will remain with him. A spankee really shouldn’t be able to choose how much he gets or when or where it happens. That’s a crucial factor in f/m relationships. If a guy thinks he can control a punishment it becomes just a game. A previous girlfriend of mine who had never spanked an adult male before gave me over 150 with a sauna brush the second time she spanked me for attitude. I had bruises into the second week. But I learned from that how severe she could be with me and what I could take and that established a firm loving disciplinary relationship for us. I think she probably spanked me that hard only once or twice again but that spanking made me respect and obey her more than a dozen lesser ones would have.

    Alan

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  5. Don't worry he will heal just fine. After some of my disciplinary paddling I was bruise for two weeks after. When ever I sat down for those two weeks I was reminded of the of the paddling and it gave me a warm thoughts towards my Mistress, for she took the time to correct me and she would have only done that out love.

    Easytopick

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  6. Wow Julie,

    You now have make your mark on david. I think that you let him know who is the boss. I bet he has a fear of the strap now. You should hang it where Rebecca can see it. That will make him think about being good when he is around her. You should not feel bad to the point where you do things you don't like. You did get me in trouble on Monday. I had to write punishment lines. Take care

    Paul

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  7. Bob: you're absolutely right about what you say. However, I will say that david was disciplined not for diet and exercise, but for disobedience to me and his trainer's orders which is a much more serious offense, meriting a hard strapping.

    Art: I like the vibe too (whatever that means!)

    Clarence: No, I will HATE it! Having a man's erection stuck up into me like that, and I will have to encourage him to pound me good and hard, as it is punishment for me after all, though he won't know that, so I'll have to moan and beg like a slut! Terrible!

    Alan: While I do feel guilty for not being in control properly, I don't feel guilty about giving him a punishment that he will remember for a good long time, and thus learn to mind me better, as you suggest.

    Easy: I'm hoping david will be just like you.

    Paul: I LOVE the idea of hanging up the strap in the gym!!! I dare say he will be very afraid of that strap! I also dare anybody to ask me what's it's for! Ha Ha! What did you have to write for your punishment lines?

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  8. Hi Julie, How funny that Suffolk had to write punishment lines, indirectly Julie you made me write punishment lines on Monday! I had written a really (good?)long comment (like you asked for, only for this page to tell me I had gone over 4000 and something characters! Trying to edit it I lost the bloody lot! So be warned people out there, you can only write so much to here X is approx 300 characters (8 lines) so 1000 is roughly 24 lines, so to be safe 90 lines or less I THINK !!!

    So in future if I write a long one, it will be split into two.
    I was going to write about the continuation on my Sunday (last week caning) 'til I read about your strapping of David. Mine seemed quite tame after that. Yes that is a tawse, they used to be used by Scottish teachers.
    I am going to tell you instead about something that happened to me on the 4th of april 2004, I know the date because Kate took some pictures and had got the date thing turned on. She always said this was the best thrashing she ever gave me, or the worst. It was given when she was angry and had lost her temper. Right that is 27 or 28 lines of this little box, I'll start anew later John xx

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  9. Hi John,

    And I gather it's even worse because I understand you men write your comments with only one hand. Ha Ha!

    I would love to hear about your "thrashing" from Kate. But I was also most interested in whether those two friends of Kate came over after the dog incident to watch you get the cane? If so, I would love to hear about how that went down, as I am fascinated with the idea of punishing david in front of other women.

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  10. Julie, I use both hand to type with. "Rude Policy." That is why I had to write the lines. I think you should get david to put the hook up in the gym and not tell him why. Then with out him knowing and before Rebecca hang the strap aka Tawse Just sit back and see if he or she comes to you first about it. Maybe she will use it has a motivation tool.

    Great looking picture.
    Paul

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  11. Hi Paul,

    Great idea to hang the strap in the gym! But I'd rather be standing over him with the strap in my hand as he's putting in the hardware! Ha Ha!

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  12. Hi Julie, thanks for your reply. I'll start if I may recalling 2004. Katie used to have a piece of rope about 2 feet long, she got it from her Fathers boat. She called it "Kate's Whip" It was ideal to fit in her bag, and also it did not make the quite loud "Swish Thwack) a cane makes. It used to come with us when we went away.
    We were due to go to her parents on this particular Thursday night and stay the whole weekend. I was late back from my work in London, Kate was all dressed and ready. I really did not fancy the party and suggested we went the following morning. "Get in the shower and hurry up, WE'RE GOING" I went up. I came down 10 minutes later in my dressing gown. "You are not even dressed yet, COME ON GET A F****NG MOVE ON" she yelled. I again said "Please can we go tomorrow" She looked at me, that look, I should have known. I said something funny like "You're like Dopey from Snow-White not Happy" She misunderstood (whoops) "DOPEY, I'LL WIPE THAT SMILE OFF YOUR F****NG FACE, GET THAT OFF AND GET IN THERE" pointing to the lounge. I took my dressing gown off as she opened her bag and drew out "Kate's Whip" I stood naked before her "Get in there now" she lashed my legs, and as I turned she lashed me again. "Get over the chair now" I was still half standing and half bending as the onslaught started. She whipped my bottom and legs from my lower back to the back of my knees. I was crying out and begging her to stop. The whipping seemed to go on for ever (in reality it was probably only five minutes) Eventually I collapsed over the chair. Totally beaten, I just lay there. "I think you're learning your lesson, stand up" I rose and turned to hug her and tell her I was sorry. Her eyes were blazing "Turn round and bend over, I am going to cane your bottom now, this is for being late" "NO more please Katie" I blubbed. "BEND OVER, unless you want to be whipped again"
    I don't know why, I had never done it before or since, I turned and ran out of the room.

    I'll stop there as I want this to post and not get eaten up again Johnxx

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  13. I hope david is better. Yes, better not let Rebecca call the SPCA on you, LOL!! :)

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  14. Miss Julie, I think it is a great idea to hang the tarse up in the gym. It is also a good idea to have a hook by your bedside where you can hang your brush. A good paddle brush should be kept in sight. It is a strong reminder to be respectful of the Boss.

    I wrote a comment a week or two ago about having him trim your pussy and shave your legs. This is a treat for both of you. Since you think he is clumsy you can start out slow and have him just shave your legs.

    I would also recommend that you have him begin shaving his balls and possible his entire genital area. It should be smooth at all times. This is a constant reminder to him of his position in the household and that ultimately he is your boy. Frequent surprise inspections of the region will let him know you are in charge of that too.

    As for your extra firm spanking. I think it is good for a female leader to spank extra firm from time to time. it makes it clear that you are in fact charge and are both willing and capable of delivering a solid spanking. Having said that, spankings of that degree should be fairly far apart. The threat of a repeat is all that is needed. Maintenance spankings that are occasionally very firm are a good course of action and reduce the need of excessively hard spankings.

    The fact that you realized you may have gone over board is good. It is also a good idea to let him remain a man as well by giving him back some power......just not too much power. Humble is good, humiliation to a strong degree isn't usually. you want an obedient respectful husband not a slave is my guess.

    Cheers.

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  15. annoy, you are correct. That is exactly what I want. I like the idea of keeping him bare like a baby down there. And subject to spot inspections (maybe even from Sue - oh my!). Another great excuse to spank him, perhaps even with a strict cropping of the offending area!

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  16. have you experimented with cock slapping/spanking?

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    1. A little. I've given his erection a good slap, but it only seems to make him harder! I've also used my hand (lightly) to give the back of his balls a spanking. He did not like that at all!

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  17. First of all, yowza! Half an hour across those thighs would be a vacation in heaven, even if it left me black and blue for a week. Second, though the action may be intense, it should always be delivered with love--that's the spousal duty! Third, nature provided a place for discipline, and the genitals are not it. Fourth, since when is any sort of consensual sex degrading? Sex is the sacred bond, and whatever you may do out of bed, I hope that you and your husband keep that bond strong and loving through the years. Strong opinions have I earned that half hour? :-)

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    1. You certainly have!
      Now get across my knees for your whipping!

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  18. I hate to be a contrarian here, but I believe you need to know what the various disciplinary instruments and techniques feel like and the kinds of damage they can do before you can effectively and safely employ them. In all seriousness, you should consult an experienced domme, and certainly submit to a session yourself, before continuing. These are serious instruments. A beating that raises purple bruises (hematoma) lasting for days, particularly along the backs of the legs, can raise serious health issues.

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    1. Thank you again (I take it you posted the other comment as well on the previous entry?)
      I was a little inexperienced back then and clearly got a tad carried away. I feel bad and I have been more careful since. I am now pretty safe with my strap. I can still get what I want with a good bum beating (no legs, just a bit of thigh as you suggest). In fact, we are about to go consult a pro, and I will be sure to ask about safety tips. As to submitting to a session myself? Dream on, this little lilly white ass is stayin' that way!

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  19. Congrats again Julie for being so straight forward and "unbendable" in your acts. Seems that you always do as you say and it seems to be a top rule in that lifestyle , as I realize surely , to have a good grip on our man , their heart and behaviour. Anxious to catch up in reading your blog , hope you be more indulgent with yourself , but seems you found a good way to make "amend" with yourself without having apologizing to him . Wise woman :D

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    1. Doing what you say with regards to punishment is critical to satisfying a subby boy's needs. They crave firm and unbending discipline. This is what they otherwise lack. Too much getting away with nonsense. If you say you are going to spank for this or that behaviour, you must carry through. If you promised to given him the strapping of a lifetime, you must carry through even if you have second thoughts.

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